lazyferret

2012-01-29T16:49:00.008Z

Ἐν ἀρχῇ ἦν ὁ Λόγος*

Always wanted to start something with that, so a blog post about books is as good as anything I suppose. A round up of the books I've read in the last year or so. Well, since I posted the last list anyway...

1. "The Secret Speech" by Tom Rob Smith
2. "They Found Him Dead" by Georgette Heyer
3. "Mort" by Terry Pratchett
4. "London Labour and the London Poor" by Henry Mayhew
5. "Hops and Glory" by Pete Brown
6. "No Wind of Blame" by Georgette Heyer
7. "The Truth" by Terry Pratchett
8. "From the Holy Mountain" by William Dalrymple
9. "A Blunt Instrument" by Georgette Hayer
10."Superfreakonomics" by Levitt & Dubner
11."Unseen Academicals" by Terry Pratchett
12."The Uses of Literacy" by Richard Hoggart
13."Duplicate Death" by Georgette Heyer
14."The Fry Chronicles" by Stephen Fry
15."All gone to Look for America" by Peter Millar
16."Detection Unlimited" by Georgette Heyer
17."Making Money" by Terry Pratchett
18."Last Act in Palmyra" by Lindsey Davis
19."Perry Boys" by Ian Hough
20."Anything Goes" by Lucy Moore
21."Interesting Times" by Terry Pratchett
22."The Jaguar Smile" by Salman Rushdie
23."King Harald's Saga" translated by Magnus Magnusson
24."The Calendar" by David Ewing Duncan (re-read again)
25."The Ecclesiastical History of the English People" by Bede

Oh dear, I've now finished all the Georgette Heyer crime novels, so I'll have to move onto something else that's light and fun to get me through the working week (when I'm not working through Mr Pratchett's ouvre that is). Perhaps I could start on Mr H's Wodehouse collection...

*'In the beginning was the Word...' John 1:1

2012-01-01T22:03:00.010Z

Festivities

This is where we spent Christmas, Mallory Court in Warwickshire. Dad, Jon and I arrived to afternoon tea on Christmas Eve and left the day after Boxing Day. On Christmas Eve we had a carol concert by the boys and men of St Mary's Collegiate Church in Warwick, which was lovely and included some interesting newer stuff alongside the traditional carols. We were looked after fantastically and loved it, especially the food. Given how much we over-research things, can you believe that we missed the fact that the restaurant was Michelin starred? We began to get an inkling at dinner on Chistmas Eve though! The food was wonderful, but so was the service, the hotel, everything really. I couldn't recommend it high enough - we even got a gift hamper when we arrived and a 'care pack' of water, nibbles, fruit, etc for the journey on leaving. More photos in the photo album on the right. Also managed to nip into Leamington Spa to have a quick look at the sales on Boxing Day!

We've had a nice peaceful uneventful week off work since then. I could really get used to not working for a living! The New Year began with soup making to use up a few things from the freezer and one or two things that were lurking ominously at the back of the 'fridge. I'm typing the recipe here 'cos it's actually an amalgam of several recipes and at least if it's here I'll know where to find it again!

Bacon and lentil Soup
Serves 12 (makes 6 pints) at 22p per 250ml serving (excluding the wine and parsley). Each portion is at least one of your '5 A Day'.

200g lentils (I prefer red, but you can use any)
200g bacon (I prefer to use smoked, but again...) finely chopped, with the fat cut off (leave it out of you just want a vegetarian soup)
2 carrots, peeled and chopped finely
2 medium onions, peeled and chopped finely
2 sticks celery, chopped finely
2 cloves garlic, peeled and crushed
400g tin tomatoes, or 4-6 ripe fresh tomatoes (those at the back of the 'fridge that are about to turn to water...), chopped finely
1 glass red wine (optional)
1 tsp fennel seeds
Half tsp dried ground coriander
Ground black pepper (taste the soup before salting as the bacon and stock will probably make it salty enough)
Pinch Cayenne pepper
3 pints vegetable or chicken stock
2 tbs chopped parsley stirred in to serve (optional).

Put all the ingredients except the parsley in a large pan. Bring to the boil and then turn the heat down and simmer for an hour until the lentils are soft.

Allow it to cool a little and then, if you like a slightly lumpy consistency, liquidize half the soup and return it to the pan. If you like it smooth then liquidize it all. Add more stock or water if the soup is too thick. Reheat and then stir in the parsley just before serving. Can be frozen.

As it's New Year's Day I thought I'd review the goals I set this time last year http://lazyferret.blogspot.com/2011_01_01_archive.html

Goals for 2011:
1. Get more exercise
Nah, was never going to happen was it?
2. Do some track days/driving 'experiences' at local motor racing circuit
No, I must do this in 2012.
3. Cook a new recipe each month
Yes, I think I managed 12 new recipes and posted them throughout the year
4. Get a hair cut - sounds easy but I've always hated going to the hairdressers and the last time I went was Sept 2009!
Yes! And have been several times since. Shocked all my colleagues who hadn't known me with short stripey hair!
5. Worry less
Nah, was never going to happen was it?
6. Sort out a new boiler
Yes, and Michel is great and was blogged about.

I'm not sure I want to set any goals this year. We'll just see how it goes!

Happy 2012!

2011-12-11T09:49:00.001Z

Food

I've been trying out some more new recipes recently - salmon, coconut and lime parcels from the Tesco magazine. Extremely easy and very tasty, although I'm not sure they came out looking quite like this picture!

I gave their Asian salmon with stir-fried noodles a go too - again easy and yummie.

I've also made these stuffed aubergines from the BBC site a couple of times, which were brilliant and looked much better than the photo that accompanies the recipe!

2011-11-11T01:06:00.001Z

Friday Fun 14

This is what I used to watch 'The Mary Whitehouse Experience' for, Rob Newman as "that nice chinese gentleman" Jarvis.

I really couldn't choose between these clips , so here he is coming over all Prince Charles; oh no, that would be awful...

2011-10-28T01:27:00.006Z

Vous êtes ici

We're recently back from our second trip to France this year. We spent the week in Le Mans because, after driving through the city on our way to the Circuit de la Sarthe for the 24 hours race a few times, we decided that we'd rather like to see what it looked like. And we can report that it is gorgeous!

We stayed in the Ibis Centre which was very handy for the old town and the tram. As hotel breakfasts are extortionate, we ate instead in various little cafes (for the bargain-hunters amongst you, we noticed that the Brioche Doree (Rue des Minimes, just off Rue de la Port) had a good breakfast offer - which we didn't try). The restaurants in the old town are a bit more pricey than those off the Place de la Republique - there are some nice little brasseries and pizza places around Republique - but I think that some of the best meals we had were in the old town. Some restaurants we tried were: La Chamade on Rue Doree; Les Trois Sonnettes on Rue des 3 Sonnettes; Le Nez Rouge on Grande Rue (brilliant but you may have to book). We did also have a great pizza in the Le Mans Legend cafe on Rue de la Port amongst all sorts of race memorabilia - well you've got to haven't you?!

Day one was spent in the cathedral and wandering around the old town and looking at the amazingly intact Roman walls. There's a lovely market in the square below the cathedral on Sunday, Wednesday and Friday mornings so we popped down and got ourselves some fruit. We also picked up a Le Mans City Pass for 10€ from the Tourist Information Office. This gives free entry into one of the museums plus a 24 hour public transport ticket and half price entry into lots of other museums and attractions. We decided to use our free entry to go to the museum of the 24 hour race out at the circuit 'cos it's the most expensive to get into and would also take us on a tram and a bus so we could use our public transport voucher too.

So, day two was spent at the Circuit de la Sarthe. The tram will only take you so far on non-race days (it will actually take you to the back of the circuit, but there's no way to get round to the front from there if it's a non-race day and the circuit is closed). We then took a bus which dropped us about half a mile from the circuit and we toddled off in search of cars. On the way we passed a bar that we'd last been in about 10 years ago after the 24 hour race. Then it was packed with the drunk and tired of all nations and the only food it had left was croque. Damn fine croque as I recall - although I may just have been tired and hungry at that point! I've got to say that, on that occasion, the bar didn't look like somewhere you'd normally want to spend a lot of time but today, when it wasn't packed with tired and emotional race fans, it looked very nice.

We had lunch in the cute little cafe at the circuit museum - you can see some of the exhibits from the cafe too (look over Mr H's shoulder as he downs his lunchtime pression). The museum doesn't just have Le Mans winning cars but includes a 'history of motoring' section which has everything from the earliest steam-powered road vehicles (death-traps on wheels they seemed to me) right through to Minis. Then it was into all the iconic Le Mans cars: Bentley, Lagonda, Lotus, GT40, Audi, etc, with a little Porsche exhibition to end. The tourist pass gives half-price entry to the circuit on non-race days so, as we could hear the sound of engines coming from there (someone testing perhaps?) we decided to go and have a look. What we actually found were members of the ACO's 'Passion 24 Club' taking their cars round the Bugatti circuit on a track day. There were some fascinating cars waiting to go on track: some rare French things that even Mr H had only seen in books and not seen in real life. There were also a gratifying number of British makes: Lotus, Jag, Morgan, MG, Triumph, all French-owned with only a couple of English number plates amongst them. We had a great time; going up into the grandstands; watching from the pit-wall and sticking our heads out of the gaps that they push the pit-boards through on race days. It was worth so much more than the couple of euros each that we'd paid to get in!

Then, as we were coming away from the pits, who should roll up but Vicki Butler-Henderson and a film crew to do a piece to camera before driving the new Ford Mustang round the circuit. Shown on Channel 5 on Friday 21st October 2011 and which I think you can catch online on C5's 'on demand' service. All that and I got to go on a tram as well! That's what I call a good day out.

Of course Le Mans has very strong claims on English sensibilities, and not just because of the 70,000 Brits who invade every June. Geoffrey of Anjou (Plantagenet) married Empress Matilda (daughter of and heir to Henry I of England) in Le Mans and his son Henry (who became Henry II of England) was baptised there. Following the death of Henry's son King Richard I (Cœur de Lion) his widow Berengaria retired to Le Mans. As an aside, Geoffrey of Anjou's mother was Eremburga of La Flèche - the town Chippenham is twinned with. Le Mans itself is twinned with Bolton. Yes, Bolton... What, in the name of all that is holy, possessed them to twin with Bolton? They'd obviously never visited it. However, the Bolton Food Cafe on Rue de Bolton did very nice breakfasts - no black pudding though...

As well as the amazing Roman walls by the river there is a Roman bath house (only open for orgainised visits on Tuesdays booked through the Tourist Information office so we didn't manage to get there) and remnants of Roman wall under the Plantagenet era stonework. The archaeological and history museum Carré Plantagenêt has a great view of the back of the Hotel de Ville and the surviving Plantagenet buildings incorporated into it. In one of the rooms in the museum that has Middle Ages period tombs (pictured above) there was a brilliant animation projected onto the blank walls telling the story of the Plantagenets. In French, of course, so I couldn't understand a bloody word but it was fantastic. We also visited the Musée de Tessé which is the city's fine arts museum. There are one or two little gems in there, but the absolutely bestest thing is that downstairs, as well as displaying all their Egyptian antiquities, they have full-sized reproductions of the tombs of queen Nefertari and an official called Sennefer! They were great and more museums should do things like that. I bet they're very popular for school trips 'cos the little buggers can wander through an almost real Egyptian tomb - something very few of them will ever get to experience.

The churches we visited were wonderful too. We don't get much Romanesque stuff in Britain so it's really nice to see Romanesque buildings when we go abroad. Although the stonework can seem heavy the light just poured in (mainly because most of the windows didn't have stained glass) and many of them didn't need additional electric lighting. Highlights were Notre Dame de la Couture and Notre Dame du Pre. Notre Dame du Pre was smaller but seemed more original, so it was an interesting contrast to the larger and more central Notre Dame de la Couture which seemed to have been 'mucked about with' (technical architectural term!) a bit more.

If you do make it to Le Mans we highly recommend the bar Flaceau. It's down a little street off the Grande Rue behind Le Nez Rouge. It's only open at night and you think that you're walking into someone's house - and you are, because they open it as a cocktail bar. The two rooms of the 'bar' are furnished in what for us would be Regency style, so I'm thinking 'Empire style' as it's in France? And there's a terrace which over-looks the remains of the Roman baths and the gardens people have planted within the ruins. It's utterly wonderful and we could have spent the entire week there.

So, in short, we had a brilliant time (despite thinking that someone had nicked my case on the Eurostar to Paris - ten minutes of panic that I hope never to experience again. And, if you're the complete a*sehole who moved my case and stuck it under a seat half a carriage away, I hope your arms rot and drop off. Not that I'm bitter at all...)

2011-10-19T11:49:00.000Z

Summer Motorsport

In August we went to the 'CSMA Big Weekend', two days of racing which featured trucks, pickup trucks, Mini Se7ens, classic touring cars, single seaters and Mini Miglia. The results can be found here.As part of our CSMA club entry we got free goes on the karting track and the 4x4 'experience' like last year. As you can see, this year I drew the short straw and did the karting along with my Dad. Neither of us were terribly enthusiastic but at least it's one thing I can say I've tried and I never have to try it again! Dad was, of course, much quicker than me, but at least I wasn't last and I did actually overtake one person! The left foot braking was a doddle, but the steering was incredibly heavy and unresponsive. Once I did get the steering wheel to move the kart would turn on a sixpence without spinning but I didn't really have the energy to get it there - Dad and Jon both said the same, so it's not just weedy little me! It was also SO juddery and I couldn't put the power down smoothly. 15 minutes has never seemed so long! This year it was Jon's turn to do the 4x4 track that I did last year - much more fun!

The racing was good, with the Minis as brilliant as ever. We'd never seen truck racing before and it was definitely a spectacle - well, it was once the fumes had cleared at the start of the race!

We stayed at the Holiday Inn Stonehenge (recommended), which is on a mini service area just off the A303, and on the Sunday morning the carpark was filled with several million pounds worth of privately owned supercars on their way from London to Wilton House for a car show. Dad got quite a few photos and we Googled it when we were back home. It turned out that they were all PistonHeads' members taking their cars to a supercar charity day. No, we weren't jealous in the slightest...

2011-09-09T07:52:00.000Z

Wilts & Berks Canal

View Wilts & Berks Canal in a larger map

We've been on a couple of walks along the Chippenham branch of the Wilts & Berks canal recently. Well, actually, every time we leave our house we follow the spur of the canal towards Chippenham; the estate's roads don't have names like Canal Road, Pewsham Lock, Waters Edge for nothing you know! But during 'Archaeology Month' in July the local museum put on a guided walk to follow a stretch of the canal that most people don't see and don't know is quite so close to them - see if you can spot us here. The blue line on my map below shows the route of the walk and the pink line is a (very rough) tracing of the route of the Chippenham branch off the main canal.

It's rather fitting that the modern road follows the line of the filled in branch that came off the main canal and into the centre of Chippenham. I always find it heartening that areas of heavy industry that would have been really busy around a hundred years ago are now completely obliterated by the countryside. It just shows how quickly nature can recover. There is now no sign of the brickworks, lime-kilns, carpenters’ workshops, sawpits, dry-dock, lock-keeper’s cottage; just woodland and fields. I'm also always surprised that we know so little about the industrial and cultural heritage of the areas we live in. Some of these industries, like the brickworks, struggled on into the 20th century, but we know bugger all about them until some volunteer or researcher goes rooting around in the undergrowth.

The Wilts and Berks Canal Trust has spent the best part of 40 years restoring the length of the canal and we've watched their progress between Pewsham Locks and Lacock for over 20 years. They've recently been dredging the section between Pewsham and Reybridge and, for the first time in over 100 years, areas of it now have water. We took these photos on our second walk. This was along the length of the Pewsham to Lacock section (approx 4 miles each way) and, although it may not look much to you - just a pretty stretch of water like you'd see anywhere, this thing that now actually looks like a canal was just boggy ground with a few reeds sticking out of it not that long ago.

The Sustrans cycle route (National Cycle Network Route 403 [an offshoot of NCN4]) follows part of the canal but, unfortunately, the Lacock end has been blocked by a lease dispute with the new landowner for the last 2 years. So if you want to cycle into Lacock you've got to be prepared to heft your bike over 6 stiles, or just padlock it to a fence and walk the last mile or so into the village. Still, it's a pretty walk and there's the reward of an excellent pint in one of Lacock's pubs once you get there (come on, you didn't think we were walking the route for the exercise did you?!).

2011-08-26T07:03:00.002Z

Lunch Companions

I tried a couple of new recipes recently (you're waiting to see if any include squirrel now, aren't you?): tarte flambée (also known as flammekueche, and flammkuchen) a dish from Alsace that we love - I cheated a bit and used Jamie's cheat's pizza base from a few months back and it was very nice. The other was salt-crusted potatoes using 1kg evenly sized scrubbed smallish potatoes placed in a single layer in a large pan, covered with water and 30g salt. Boil until the water disappears then turn the heat down and continue to cook for a few mins, shaking the pan to turn the spuds until they are dry and wrinkled. They were nice but rather too salty for me, BUT they came out just like mini baked potatoes but took a fraction of the time so I reckon I could do them again, using less salt, and serve them as quick mini bakers.

We're very glad that June is long past, with all its expenses, but it did throw up another problem before it was done when the kitchen cabinets tried to fall off the wall. The kitchen has been in 8 years now and our dodgy plasterboard walls allowed the rawle plugs to just come straight out. Luckily we spotted it before they did drop off (partly because they were held in place by shelves which hadn't failed) but as that wall held all our booze (and don't forget we'd just had a trip to France!) and glasses, it could have been rather messy and expensive. Took Jon and his Dad a good couple of hours one evening to put everything back together again.

We finally got British Gas to come back and finish off the snagging for Michel, the new boiler. Honestly it took 12 'phone calls to get someone to come back and do a job that took less than 2 mins and which, if they'd left us the bloody manual in the first place, we could have done ourselves! Like many companies they were fine until we'd paid the bill and then they became very difficult to get hold of. But we're still very happy with Michel - he's soooo quiet - and it looks like he's saved us £35 since he was installed part way through the quarter. The shower is also wonderful and it seems to have saved several cubic metres of water already. The nasty hole in the tiles where the old shower fitting used to be has been covered by the creative use of a large blue Sigg Alu-Box as a cabinet to hold shampoo, etc. Looks great and no drilling into the tiles was required!

*****************

These are the little chaps that I share my crusts with at lunchtime. Actually I see the mice far more often than the squirrels, but they're much more nervous of people and they move quicker too!

You can see from the pictures that where I eat lunch looks like a country track rather than part of a busy urban university campus, but we're outside the city proper and there's lots of green space. The path was great because it had become so over-grown that all the seats were almost hidden from each other, so we could all eat and read in our own little worlds. When I threw bits of lunch around for the birds something (mouse, blackbird or brambling) popped out of the bushes, grabbed a piece and dashed back in again with their booty. It’s quite odd to sit on a bench and hear scrabbling and squeaking from the undergrowth around you and behind your head and not be able to see the source! But the undergrowth was so dark that all I could see was a piece of bread or pasta levitating its way along the side of the path, and not the little critter carrying it!

I say 'the path was great' because I went down for lunch about a fortnight after I’d taken these pictures and the place had been decimated. A rather chuffed groundsman was admiring his work at clearing all the growth away to reveal a wide boulevard lined with hitherto unsuspected dry stone walls which he'd pushed the benches back against. The trees used to over-hang the benches so that you could eat lunch in the rain without getting wet, but these had been sawn back too. I couldn’t believe the change: from a thin country track barely two feet wide it had become a two metre-wide gravelled municipal park path.

It’s not an over-statement to say that I was devastated and spent much of my lunch break on the verge of tears. But, as I disconsolately chucked a bit of bread for the birds (who were hopping around looking a bit disoriented), slowly, out came the mice. I was SO happy to see that they hadn’t all run away. They were peering out of the dry-stone walls and scampering out from under the remainder of the bushes and I have to say that I see much more of them now than before – but then I’m sure that predators do too. They are beyond cute.

So, that’s me, turning into mad-old-lady-feeding-vermin and having my happiness levels dictated by whether I see mice at lunchtime… But I really do enjoy watching wildlife getting on with its business without taking much notice of me. Today I was surrrounded by a flock of long-tailed tits hopping through the branches of the pine tree looking for grubs with something small and yellow (woodwarbler?) following in their wake, whilst a lesser spotted woodpecker could be heard alittle further off. Almost made me forget to go back into work at the end of my lunch break!

2011-08-10T13:17:00.021Z

Ah, the sounds of summer in the city: the gentle tinkle of glass on pavement...

The fashions hark back to the mid-1980s, there's a recession on which is accompanied by mass youth unemployment, there are riots on the streets of Toxteth, London and Birmingham sparked by police brutality - yes, the Tories must be back in power again...

But politics aside; we had one of our best days for ages yesterday at the Science Museum's 'Big Object Store' at Wroughton, on the site of the ex-WWII aerodrome just outside Swindon. WANHS had organised a behind the scenes tour of the store, archive and library as very little public access is allowed at the moment due to the deteriorating state of some of the aircraft hangars that are used to store the objects and financial constrains forcing them to abandon anything outside their core remit.

It was absolutely stunning. First there are the WWII hangars which are brill. in themselves, but then to go in and find them stuffed with everything from lawn mowers to Polaris nuclear missiles (stuff that make bomb go bang been safely removed), taking in mark 1 hovercraft, trams, 18th century fire engines, a Dan-Air jet and just about anything you can think of in between. We went in 2 stores, a refurbished store (who'd have thought that an empty warehouse could be so interesting?!) before seeing the archives. The archive building included a very early Daimler with the Royal Carriage Collection - they were all housed in the archive because the conditions were better for them than in the hangars.

I had an interview at the library in 2008 before I got this job and I'm now rather glad that I didn't get it 'cos I would never have done any work and would have been sacked! The archive includes coach builders' plans of their custom-built bodies for Daimlers, Bentleys, Maharajas' Rolls Royces, etc. They have Donald Campbell's photos and diaries, plans for the Conway and Britannia tubular bridges, Charles Rolls' photo albums of his early exploits driving motorcars and motor bicycles, Barnes Wallis's plans for the R100, the paintings of Egypt from Napoleon's Egypt expedition, and so much more. I could quite happily go up there everyday for the rest of my life and just look through the archive a drawer at a time! Honestly, I thought I'd died and gone to heaven.

Almost as good was driving the length of the main runway to get there. Well worth a day off work. We had lunch at Barbary Inn, Broad Hinton. Beer was excellent and the food was a little slow but very nice.

Seeing the hovercraft, hearing about their Concorde and reading elsewhere about the final Space Shuttle flight made us rather sad. All of these innovative mid-20th century projects have now been de-commissioned - no hovercraft has taken you across the Channel for over a decade, no Concorde will fly you to New York in record time, no Shuttle will ever get the chance to take you to the moon for a holiday - it seems to show a lack of ambition and financial will in the governments of Europe and America to fund exciting projects. But perhaps I've just answered my own point. Perhaps it's an indication of innovation and development moving eastwards as Japan and China develop bullet trains, use hovercraft and American astronauts start hitching a lift with the Russians.

2011-07-01T15:32:00.002Z

Friday fun 13

Ah, the bard of Salford in a Peel Session from 1978 (really, 1978, where does the time go?). The lyrics are below for the more poetically inclined...

make a date with the brassy brides of britain
the altogether ruder readers' wives
who put down their housework and their knitting
at the doorway to our dismal daily lives

the fablon top scenarios of passion
nipples peep through holes in leatherette
they seem to be saying in their fashion
'I'm freezing charlie - haven't ya finished yet?'

in latex pyjamas with bananas going ape
their identities are cunningly disguised
by a six-inch strip of insulation tape
strategically stuck across their eyes

cold flesh the colour of potatoes
in an instamatic living room of sin
all the required apparatus
too bad they couldn't het 'er head in

wives from inverness to inner london
prettiness and pimples co-exist
pictorially wife-swapping with someone
who's happily married to his wrist

LYRICS © JOHN COOPER CLARKE

2011-06-12T14:56:00.010Z

Busy (and expensive) week

Mum's memorial fund currently stands at just over £1000, so thank you to everyone for their generosity. The money is going to research into and treatment of ovarian cancer at The Christie Hospital in Manchester, which looked after her so well.

Anyway, this time last weekend Jon and I were in Erquy, Brittany, with the outlaws. We went over for a long weekend but the rest of the family were there until the end of the week. Pictures of our trips to Dinan and Fort La Latte are over in the new photo album =>. At Fort La Latte we all (including 4.5 yr old nephew) went up the very dodgy steps on the outside of the roof right to the top of the donjon (the very top of the tallest thing in the picture above). It was bloody scary looking down the walls of the donjon for a couple of hundred feet and then a few more hundred feet down a sheer cliff to the sea, with only a rope to hang on to, and Jon was the only person brave enough to walk normally back down to the ramparts - Claire and I came down backwards and Neil came down on his bum!

When we got back home Jon had a couple of days off to 'supervise' the installation of the new boiler - I'm still trying not to think of what it's cost! And, sadly for you, I promised to post photos of it when we originally thought it was going to be done in Jan 2010! Our new Vaillant boiler has officially been named Michel and seems to have already acquired fridge magnets of Bob Cramer and Jo Barett.

At the same time we've had (thankfully) to remove the noisy water- and energy-hungry power shower from the en suite 'cos it wouldn't work with the new boiler and replace it with a rather sexy chrome mixer. It's so quiet and lovely! But we now have some holes to fill in where the power shower was taken out.

We also have a hole in the kitchen to fill because we've had the new boiler moved into the airing cupboard instead. Unfortunately, that's going to mean a trip to Ikea to match the existing cupboards - so I can't see us putting ourselves through that agony anytime soon! So, this week has seen: a trip to France, a new boiler and shower, my car being MOTd and serviced and next week my bike gets MOTd and serviced. I think we're going to be on bread and water for the rest of the month 'cos the bank balance is in meltdown!

2011-05-29T10:14:00.004Z

Dad came down to visit over the first Bank Holiday weekend in May so we took the chance to go to the rhododendron walk at Bowood, which is only a couple of miles up the road from us but which we've never managed to visit in the 21 years we've lived here! Although it was so early in the season it was really very impressive. And yes, I did take a picture of almost every bloom in the garden!

Had the usual trip to Lacock, only a couple of days after we'd been there for lunch (ooo, my birthday meal At The Sign of the Angel was fabbie. It was a lovely day so we finished the wine off in their back garden). We also made it to the Motors TV Live Raceday at Castle Combe on the Monday. We also recorded it (to see the crashes that you miss when you're actually there) and could see me and Dad pogging about in the Paddock in one shot! Oooo, fame at last...

Oh, and May's new recipe was Potatoes Boulangere. Very nice but I had loads left so it's in the freezer and will no doubt be turned into Nigel Slater's smoked mackrel dauphinoise, with the addition of cream, mustard and the fish. Or maybe his stove-top dauphinoise.

2011-04-27T20:28:00.005Z

Food

I managed to cook several new recipes recently, as per one of my goals that I set at the beginning of the year. In February we had Goulash Soup based on a recipe which first appeared in Delia's Frugal Food back in the '70s. This is a book that I got two of for Christmas, so obviously rumours of my tightwaddery are spreading! I've loved goulash since we first ate it in a Hungarian restaurant in Ross-on-Wye almost 25 years ago, although one of my favourites was in Prague when it was served in a hollowed out loaf. Anyway, we had goulash soup a couple of times in Austria and Germany, so I thought I'd try cooking it and it was extremely good. I made a couple of changes to the above recipe: I added a carrot, I used pork rather than beef and I added a bit of celery.

March's new recipe was Jamie Oliver's Cheat's Pizza which was great. I seem to recall cooking an similar Elizabeth David pizza base (without yeast) and it came out tasting like pastry, but Jamie's version tasted like a thin pizza dough. Our toppings were ancvhovies, olives and chilli. I've got to say that I've enjoyed watching back-to-back re-runs of his Jamie's 30-Minute Meals on Sunday afternoons whilst I've been doing the ironing. I may have to invest in the book.

April's new recipe was Simon Hopkinson's version of Janssen's Temptation from Week in Week Out, but this one by Jane Grigson isn't too different.

Instead of going to Syria we went to one of our favourite hotels, Northcote Manor in Devon. This time in Jon's Dad's MX5 rather than George's Morgan - one day we'll go in our own car! The food was as wondeful as last time. And for my birthday we're off to At the Sign of the Angel in Lacock. I can't believe that we've lived 5 miles away for 22 years and have never been there yet - I hope I'm not disappointed!

2011-04-16T07:20:00.008Z

In Memoriam

Two funerals in five days. I've got to say that we've had better weeks. But the turn out at both was amazing. With Gran H being 95, you don't expect many people to attend because most of their contemporaries are either dead or unable to travel; but Gran was such a great character that she had an impact on so many people's lives in the village and beyond, so the church was full. It was a very fitting tribute to her. I felt really guilty 'cos people kept coming up to me and saying, "Oh, you're so brave to come to Gran's just funeral before your Mum's", but as I said, "A day off work and a free lunch, what's not to turn up for?". I'm going to steal a comment that a friend made when we told him about Gran, I hope he doesn't mind, "You are right - jolly good innings - just took her eye off the ball as she closed in on her century. Never mind, splendid knock all the same." It's a cricketing metaphore that my Mum would have appreciated, but I suspect that she was slightly less than chipper to be bowled out for 73.

My parents' house had a small rain-forest's worth of cards when we got there at the weekend, with 10 - 20 more arriving in every post. We expected a good crowd at my Mum's, with her being a pillar of the church and on just about every circuit committee going but, when we got to church, a friend came out and said, "You won't believe how many people are in there." The church has folding doors at the back that can be opened to use an annex, and the back of the annex also has sliding doors that can be opened to bring the church hall into use. Well, both of those were open and the tables that had been set out in the hall for the post-funeral refreshments had to be moved. A conservative estimate is 250 people, many of whom had come from all corners of the counrty.

It was a very nice service - you can always tell when a Minister has actually known the deceased - and there was some excellent Methodist singing, with the Welsh exiles saying that the rendition of Guide Me, O Thou Great Jehovah was better than they'd heard at the Millenium Stadium (you know, I nearly typed Cardiff Arms Park there)!

We had a great 'funeral tea' (I was still eating the left-overs a week later!) and many people stayed 'til we'd got back from the crem., so we did lots of chatting and circulating. Varty's did a lovely job, as usual, but I felt like saying to Bill, "Don't take this amiss, but I really hope we don't see you for a while!", as 3 funerals in 2 years is enough for anyone. Mum's funeral was only a week short of being 2 years to the day since we'd buried her Mother. I think Dad's nearly paid for that natty little XF that the pall-bearers use on his own!

Funny moment of the last few weeks: when the Minister visited Mum a few days before died it was the first time that I'd met her 'cos she's quite new to the church. She looked at my Mum's comatose visage, looked at me, looked back to Mum and said, "Ooo, yes, I can see whose daughter you are!". I've got to say that my Mum had looked better than she did at that moment, but what do you say? "Er, yes, thanks..." was all I managed!

At the same moment we were cremating my Mum, the travel company was leaving a message on our answerphone telling us that the trip to Syria was cancelled. OK, so we'd expected it, but their timing could have been better! We've re-booked for the same trip next year. Apparently, for some travellers, it will be third time lucky as their trip last year was cancelled because of the ash cloud! So we're nicking the in-laws' MX5 and heading down to Northcote Manor in Devon again for the Easter weekend. I think we will appreciate some luxury and pampering.

Anyway, just because rellies are dying left right and centre and my holiday has been cancelled, that's no excuse not to listen to some excellent music. Currently playing on the car's CD is Faure's Requiem and I've managed to find the same version on-line. So here is the sublime Pie Jesu sung even more sublimely by Suzanne Danco (Decca 1960)

2011-03-29T19:28:00.004Z

More Funerals

We've had two deaths in the space of a week. Jon's paternal Gran died in the early hours of Sunday 20th March and my Mum died at lunchtime on Saturday 26th. It was very sad to see Gran, who was always more akin to a force of nature, deteriorate over the past month or so, but she made it into her mid-90s - my Mum passing at 73 was rather more of a shock. Well, not an immediate shock, because we knew it was happening but in our families we just expect the women to live longer than that!

Mum had ovarian cancer 5 years ago and it came back very agressively during last year. After spending 8 weeks in The Christie Hospital in Manchester receiving excellent care and treatment, they found that the cancer wasn't responding to the chemo. So she had 4 weeks at home being looked after by my Dad and some lovely carers and District Nurses.

So, Gran's funeral is on Friday and Mum's is next Tuesday.

If anyone who knew Mum would like to donate to the Christie Hospital memorial fund, you'll find it here

2011-03-18T01:35:00.002Z

Friday Fun 12

We've had a little run of seeing comedians recently: Dr Phil Hammond a couple of weeks ago and, on Sunday, we went to see Punt and Dennis in Bath. They were as fabbie as ever and I was ever so chuffed when they did one of my favourite routines in the 2nd half although, as it's nearly 25 years old, I'm not sure it counts as 'topical' comedy!

And this is it...one of their early things (from when they were on Jasper Carrott's show in the mid-'80s) which we still giggle about at home when I'm using wine in cooking. Chefs always say that, if you're using wine in food, you should use the wine you're going to serve with it. Our reaction - Bollocks! If anyone thinks I'm putting six+ quid's worth of wine into a scalding hot frying pan they're seriously unhinged. Jon doesn't approve of me using any alcohol in cooking, not on religious or ethical grounds, it's just less for him to drink; so his reaction is always the same as Hugh Dennis's wine correspondent, "You poured it on a fissshhh? You POURED it on a FISSSSHHHH?! I'm gonna come round there and suck your fisssshhhh."

I'll be as sick as a dog in the morning...

2011-02-20T21:35:00.005Z

Goals update

I'm doing quite well at knocking a few of my goals for the year over:

3. Cook a new recipe each month January's new recipe was yet another stuffed pepper/tomato one - when I've visited Greece I've just lived off these for a week or more, only picking other dishes every few nights just so I don't seem wierd (OK, make that TOO wierd. Anyway, this has been lurking in my recipe file for many years and may have been cut out of Woman and Home magazine. This must be the most expensive stuffed pepper/tom recipe I have; because of the cheese, lamb and eggs, but it was very nice. I noticed that my supermarket now does a value brand feta-style 'salad cheese', so that might help bring the price down a bit.

Greek stuffed tomatoes

Serves 4

Note: I used peppers and, as they tend to be larger than beef tomatoes, I added an onion with the garlic and added the chopped sliced flesh from the stalk end when I cut off the tops. Peppers don't always sit nicely on their bases so lie them on their flatest side and slice the upper side off - that way they still keep the stalk for aesthetic effects. If you're using largeish peppers you may need to add some rice when you put the wine in for extra bulk, or perhaps use twice as much feta. Instead of breadcrumbs you can use a plain unsweetened breakfast cereal like bran flakes or Weetabix. If you're using peppers then finely chop 8 tomatoes (or a tin of them).

Oil for frying and drizzling
2 cloves garlic, chopped finely
4 tablespoons fresh oregano leaves (or 1 tablespoon of dried - try marjoram or parsley if you're out of oregano)
500g minced lamb
150ml dry white wine
8 ripe beef tomatoes
salt and ground black pepper
50g breadcrumbs
2 medium eggs
100g feta cheese, crumbled or diced

Heat the oil and fry the garlic (and onion and pepper 'lid', if used) for a few moments.
Add the oregano and stir.
Add the mince, break it up with a fork and stir until it changes colour.
Add the wine, turn up the heat and bubble until the liquid evaporates.
Turn the heat off and leave to cool.
Remove the tops from the tomatoes and carefully scoop out the insides, being very careful not to puncture the tamato.
Cut the woody bitter core from the tomato innards and chop them and the lids very finely (or puree in a food processor).
Stir the eggs, breadcrumbs, seasoning and feta into the meat mixture (I put the tomato innards in too, but read on for a different option).
Stuff the meat mixture into the tomatoes.
Put the tomatoes into a shallow casserole dish, tightly packing them in will help stop them splitting.
Pour the tomato puree around them.
Cook covered in a medium oven (gas 5-ish/190c) for an hour.
Uncover and cook for a further 30 mins to become golden on top.
Remove from the oven and let them stand for 15 mins.
Serve at room temp drizzled with a little olive oil and scattered with some chopped parsley.

4. Get a hair cut - sounds easy but I've always hated going to the hairdressers and the last time I went was Sept 2009! Done - the hair is once again short and has blond highlights. It's the first time it's been short since April 2007. The hairdresser thought it was very funny when she asked why I was getting it all cut off and I replied, 'Cos it's blocking the hoover!'. Other reasons are: will cost less in gas to heat the water to wash it; will take less time to wash; will cost less in shampoo and conditioner; will take less time to try to comb the knots out after washing it; etc etc etc

2011-02-06T09:11:00.003Z

I am angry

I am really REALLY angry. I don't often voice my opinions on politics and such like (OK, Jon would differ with me there, so let's say 'in public'...), but I still get bombarded with other people's ill-informed cretinous musings on a daily basis: in person, through the media, etc. Why do people think I want to hear their bigoted ramblings? Why do people think it's acceptable to use casual racist/sexual/homophobic language in everyday speech? I honestly would like to go around thinking the best of my fellow human beings but, unfortunately, they show me on a daily basis that the majority of the British people should not be allowed to voice their opinions on ANYTHING. Because, even if they're discussing the state of their petunias, they'll immediately segway off into how their garden's less than perfect display either: is the fault of immigrants/gays/women; is down to too much rain which disproves global warming; is because 'they' stop us from using DDT to kill pests; is because we only have a fortnightly bin collection; is because next door's cat peed on it; is because the weather forecasters lied to us; is because of 'Europe'...

Shut up, shut up, SHUT UP, you STUPID people.

What has sparked this latest rant? Well, I think it's been on a slow burning fuse since the elections last year, because all of us trendy lefties knew that the Labour government was broadly shit and had let us down massively. OK, there were improvements in the NHS and taxes fell (yes, they did, don't just believe the crap on tax fed to you by your newspaper, get out there and check the facts for yourself, taxes were lower than under Mrs T and her cronies) but on the minus side they brought in student loans, let The City get out of hand and social inequality has got much worse, to mention but three. But we felt unable to criticise because they were Labour, so they must be good, right? Well, now the Tories are back and normal service has been resumed; we can let our critical faculties off the leash again. More immediately it's been caused bylast week's survey on how 23% of British people apparently think that immigration is 'our biggest problem'; our esteemed leader's speech on how 'Multiculturalism has failed'; Lord Carlisle's views that the UK has become a 'safe haven' for terrorists, etc, etc ad nauseum.

So, 59% of British people think that there are 'too many' immigrants and want them not to have access to the NHS and public services. They say that immigrants take jobs from British workers: BUT YET, at the same time, they want more foreign doctors, nurses and care workers. It's sooooo hard for me not to see this country as full of ignorant small-minded selfish bigots. The pond-life that are dragged in for these surveys... no I'll amend that, the pond-life that seem to make up the majority of the people whose opinions I have to listen to day after day, say that we live on a small, overcrowded island. No, we don't, have you flown over it lately? There's just acre upon acre of rolling countryside that isn't going to be built over any time soon. And now that the coalition government is shutting the economy down, there'll be loads of brownfield sites in towns and cities on which to build. Immigrants take our jobs do they? What, the ones you don't want to do, like: spud picking in Norfolk; wiping old people's bums; giving people good service in cafés; cleaning for less than the minimum wage; coming round to fix my plumbing and not ripping me off in the process? But, when your granny does need looking after, you'd rather we got a nurse or doctor in from a country that can ill-afford the draining away of its medical staff to do it? Perhaps you think they'll be cheap.

They don't like immigrants, but who's going to pay for the pensions of the pond-life in years to come? The way the state pension was set up a century ago, all the money your parents paid in went to pay the pensions of the people who had already retired. My payments are currently helping to fund my retired in-laws' Caribbean cruise. But, as the population ages, there will be a higher proportion of retired people to workers by the time we retire: who's going to be paying the National Insurance needed to pay our state pensions then? Yes, those immigrants.

The quote, “Never underestimate the power of human stupidity”, has been attributed to many people over the last century, and I've got to say that this survey just feeds my prejudices that the majority of the British people are stupid – and selfish. I firmly believe that anyone who reads a newspaper other than the Guardian, Indie, Telegraph or Times should not be allowed to vote, and should preferably not be allowed to speak in public, except to say 'hello, nice day' or 'can I have a pound of potatoes please?'. The red tops, tabloids, call them what you will, peddle malevolent anti-social trash that their ill-educated dullards of a readership swallow whole and regurgitate as ill-informed anti-immigrant, anti-'benefits cheat', anti-Islamic bile (but I'm not completely sure that the 'quality' 'papers are necessarily any better, so I think the criteria on which I'd judge whether people were fit to vote would need to be refined further). These 'papers pander to the innate selfishness of the white working and lower middle classes, with their myths of 'someone's getting more than you and they don't deserve it'. Once we thought that the working class voted Labour because they wanted a fairer society. As soon as Thatcher came along and offered them cheap council houses it became clear that they had simply been voting Labour because they thought they could get more for themselves and stuff everyone else and were happy to change allegiance when a better offer came along. Fairer society? Stuff that if it means helping a woman and her child fleeing war in Sierra Leone; if it means contributing to an aid budget that helps people in poorer countries, so that they stay there and don't have to feel like they need to travel half way round the world to escape being starved, raped and brutalised; if it means funding parenting classes for single mothers so that their kids don't grow up into anti-social yobs; funding ex-offender schemes to help them become employable and not go straight back inside.

Multiculturalism has failed has it? Look at the ghettos in France, the racism in foreign football, the fact that every non-white foreign sportsman who comes over here says how nice the British are to them. The UK is one of the better integrated western countries, depressing as that may sound to those of us who grew up with the race riots of the '70s and hoped that improved education and tolerance would have brought about some sort of multiculural utopia by the 21st century. The places where multiculturalism is perceived to have failed and where the far right parties get the biggest share of the vote are the areas that are less racially mixed, that are mostly white. This is the fear-factor at work, promulgated by incautious ill-informed speeches like Cameron's. Previous data, as well as the survey mentioned above, have shown that the more we mix with other races or immigrants, the more positive we feel toward them. So, he thinks that sections of our society threaten it's laws and cohesion by, for example, believing that homosexuality is evil; protesting outside theatres showing plays they disagree with and threaten violence to the audience and participants; they withdraw their children from school because they object to the national curriculum; they pick and choose the sections of their holy book to support their hateful views; they burn the texts sacred to other religions; they threaten violence to members of the medical profession carrying out legal procedures – Muslims? Oh no, sorry, I was talking about evangelical Christians, my mistake. How about improving deprived areas, rather than decimating them, to ensure that all the people in those areas, black, white and Asian can fulfil their potential? How about improving all schools to give minorities and the white working class a leg up, rather than pouring money into 'free schools' for the already sharp-elbowed middle classes? Oh, and thanks Lord Carlisle; removing people's human rights will make us all safer will it? Well, I don't want to live in a country where citizens can be put under house arrest without being given a reason. Or does it make it OK if they're a different colour? I don't notice many far-right activists being given control orders. Internment didn't work with the IRA 30 years ago and it certainly won't work now. You'd hope society would move forward over the years not regress, wouldn't you?

Oh, and don't think that I'm just baiting the white working class. The sudden appearance of the 'squeezed middle' and their almost pathological whining is obscene. The fact that the top 25%* of earners will lose their child benefit in 2 year's time is NOT a case for national mourning. All the articles around this topic just served to show one thing: that being a 'benefits scrounger', 'benefits dependent', 'sponging off the state', having more children than you can afford to bring up on your salary, is a bad thing unless it's being done by the middle classes. The trotting out of case studies in the broadsheets focussing on the families of headmasters with 4 children whose poor ickle wifees will suddenly have to get a job because they're losing £2k of benefits a year was, frankly, pathetic. If you claim to be an intelligent person who can't make those savings from your existing income, or get a part time job of 6.5 hours a week (yes, that's all it would take and I bet you can fit that in around play school can't you?), well, I pity you, I really do, and I question whether you should be having children in the first place 'cos you're obviously TOO STUPID. The whole furore around this issue showed that the middle classes do not believe in self-reliance and have become a mob of selfish, whingeing ponces who would much rather continue to sponge off the state and allow the burden of the coalition's cuts fell on someone else, preferably the poor.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not supporting the government. The whole panic around the deficit and the cuts needed to deal with it is deeply damaging for the country. I'm a dyed in the wool Keynesian and firmly believe that we should be pumping money into public works to get the economy moving. But, if there are going to be cuts, why shouldn't the top 25% of earners shoulder more of the burden than the bottom 75%?

Are you a bit sulky that you earn £35k and you're going to have to start paying 40% tax on the amount that you earn over that figure? Aw, diddums, just think that the upcoming tax changes will mean that 500,000 people who currently earn less than £7,475 will no longer have to pay tax. But that's not going to make you feel better is it, because you're a selfish git. Can you imagine earning that little? It probably wouldn't keep you in holidays for the year, would it? But some people actually do try to live on that. Unfortunately, it does also mean that all those poor ickle middle class women doing their 6.5 hours a week to make up for losing their child benefit will also not pay tax, but the world isn't perfect...

I can't believe how people can spout complete crap that they know nothing about and not realise how ignorant they are. After the election one woman said, “We must be the laughing stock of Europe because of the time it's taken for the coalition to come together!”. (That's the stock in phrase of these bottom-feeders, 'laughing stock of Europe'. I can never understand why, because most of the people spouting it are anti-European so why should they care what the Europeans think?). Until recently the Dutch held the record at over 200 days to form a coalition government, with the norm being more than 20 days – so the 5 days of negotiation at Westminster begins to look like our lot weren't really trying. One BBC commentator said at the time that, in Europe, the electorate would be extremely suspicious of a coalition coming together so quickly, because they'd suspect that the politicians had been cooking something up before the election. So, any chance of these people thinking, or checking facts, before letting their gobs flap open? I'll not hold my breath...

Oh, and our holiday in Syria? I'm seriously pissed off by this being met with looks of horror, as if we've just suggested holidaying in Helmand Province. Syria is simply one of the few countries in North Africa and the Middle East that DOESN'T go, "Oooo, American money! Gimme, gimme, gimme! Would you like me to bend over further Mr President to make it easier for you to shaft me - and is there anything you'd like me to suck whilst I'm down there?". The regime in Syria is no different from the ones in Morocco, Tunisia, Egypt and Jordan, but people are quite happy to spend their long weekend in Marrakesh and, until this week, their Nile cruise and week at Sharm, or their trip to Petra. And it's sooooo much better than the ostensibly democratic regime in Turkey, but we're happy to have our cheap beach holiday there, aren't we? People happily flock to the all inclusive resorts of Mexico whilst the country implodes under the weight of its poverty; where kidnappings and mass killings are rife as the drug barons fight it out amongst themselves and with the army. So we'll have no more of the face-pulling when I mention my holiday plans, shall we?

Victoria Beckham is reported to have said that she's never read a book. Shut up you moronic stick insect this is NOT SOMETHING TO BE PROUD OF! You have children, is this any way to encourage them educationally? 'I don't have time', she says, but I bet she can find time to watch prole-fodder TV. Your every move is followed by thousands of impressionable teenage girls from deprived backgrounds, is this any way to encourage them to strive to improve their lives? When all evidence shows that improving the educational attainment of girls improves their lives and the lives of the families they go on to have, you're telling them that it's OK to limit their reading to fashion and gossip mags? Limit their aspirations to having nice hair and nails and then some record producer will magically fall out of the sky and whisk them away from all this? If your next child is a girl is this all the aspiration and encouragement she can hope for?

Oooo, that feels better. I'm beginning to see why people off-load like this. Now, is there anyone left to offend? Let me think... Oh, yes... voting rights for prisoners are a good thing and should be brought in as part of their rehabilitation process and, whilst they're at it, the government can improve the education of prisoners to ensure that they can read and understand the political literature that'll be pushed through their door once they're released.

Paternity leave should not be extended, unless it becomes 'carers' leave and is available to everyone, not just breeders.

Get rid of parent and child spaces in supermarket car parks or, better still, move them to the very furthest edge of the car park so that the spaces near the store aren't clogged by 4x4s and chav-mobiles and so that the fat gits and their offspring can get some exercise whilst lugging their readymeals and 2 litre bottles of cola back to the car.

Get rid of the universal state pension. Why should someone who was at school with me and went on to become a brickie, or got one of those fantastic council jobs you hear people like Digby Jones wapping on a about, empting bins or wiping granny's bum in a care home (yes Digby, if those public sector jobs and pensions are so fucking good, why aren't more private sector CEOs queuing up to do them?), now have to wait until they are 67 to get their state pension, when we're paying state pensions to Paul McCartney and Richard Rogers (I have nothing against these people, they are simply examples of the extremely rich)?

I like Joey Barton and El-Hadji Diouf and think they're just nice, misunderstood boys.

Now that I can't think of anyone else to offend and I probably have reduced my Christmas card list by about 90%, I'll leave you with this thought: every day I thank whatever bit of sanity that's left in the political system, and you should too, that we don't live in a country where angry middle aged women can routinely get access to guns. Especially not those nice shiney black self-loading pump-action ones, oooooooo...

*A gross annual salary of £31,759 gets you into the top 25% of earners. If you earn above £44,881 you're in the top 10%. http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/8151355.stm

2011-02-01T21:51:00.000Z

The Reckoning

When we went on our 'trip of a lifetime' to Egypt in January 2009, we were chatting to the taxi driver who had taken us to Deir el-Medina and he was asking, "Where are all the tourists?". We thought that there were lots of tourists around, but he said no, that there were usually many more and that the Egyptians were earning much less as a result. We heard the same question from a tout later in the week. We explained that we had been 'credit crunched' and that people were afraid of losing their jobs and were saving their money.

This sparked a conversation about food prices, as wheat was beginning to rise in price and at home the 500g of pasta that had cost 33p the January before was now 75p, the 70p loaf was now £1.34 and cheese had risen by 20%. These price rises were something that most of us in Britain could shrug off, but in countries where such staples make up a fair proportion of the diet and where most ordinary people had 2 or 3 jobs to try to make ends meet; what would happen, we wondered, when these price rises hit whilst coupled with less income coming in?

Well, 2 years later, I think we just found out.

2011-01-23T17:53:00.012Z

Goals

Last January I did a 10 year round-up and set myself some goals for the next 10 years and some one year ones. I did an update in June http://lazyferret.blogspot.com/search/label/goals. So, how have I done since then?

10 year goals:
1. pay off mortgage in 2012 (13 years early) This is on track to be paid off by Aug 2013
2. travel more – possibly by volunteering on archaeological/environmental projects Off on a tour of Syria's archaeological delights in the spring - I can see lots more trips like this happening, money and health permitting
3. perhaps do more studying At the moment it's more informal learning through WANHS lectures and trips like the one above
4. work less Ummmm, need to work on this one a bit more...
5. enjoy life more Am basically a miserable git so I'm battling against my nature here, but still persevering!
6. do more draft/scary things to prove I’m still alive See no. 7
7. use the motorbikes more – preferably abroad, preferably Libya, Iceland and Morocco Details of trip to Germany was posted in July

Goals for 2010:
1. re-mortgage in Feb when our 10 year fixed rate ends Done
2. over-pay mortgage to allow us to pay it off early Done
3. do at least one long motorbike holiday this year, even if it does rain all summer, again Yes, 2 weeks in Germany. It did rain and was very hard work. Maybe do an organised tour in future. But didn't die and had no major disasters...
4. get more exercise Needs more work

Goals for 2011:
1. Get more exercise
2. Do some track days/driving 'experiences' at local motor racing circuit
3. Cook a new recipe each month
4. Get a hair cut - sounds easy but I've always hated going to the hairdressers and the last time I went was Sept 2009!
5. Worry less
6. Sort out a new boiler

2011-01-21T07:56:00.002Z

Friday Fun 11

A celebration of tea, what could be better?

2010-12-18T15:26:00.006Z

We were supposed to delivering presents to Wigan this weekend but cancelled the trip on Thursday after looking at the weather forecast. Quite glad we did now after hearing tales of people being stuck on the M6 all night. No snow here when we went to bed last night, but it was almost 5 inches deep when we woke this morning. At my parents' house in Wigan they have had about 10 inches of snow.

We walked into town to get a few groceries which gave me chance to use my new Russian-style 'fur' hat, a freebie courtesy of the snow sports federation in the next office to mine. And very warm it was too!

Hopefully UPS will be delivering the pressies on Tuesday for me!

We're not completely sure how to hang the wreath on the new front door yet, but this will have to do for now. So, we're now fully Xmas decorated and I've worked out that we've got at least enough ingredients in the 'fridge/cupboard for at least 10 main meals (and that's excluding the 2 pheasants for Xmas Day that are currently residing in the freezer) before we're forced to live on soup, par-baked bread rolls and some really weird food combinations. Next door's cat and I also keep eyeing-up a couple of really plump pigeons in the garden so, if the worst comes to the worst, I can always lay a trail of bread crumbs to the back door...

So the weather can do its worst really.

Happy Christmas!

2010-11-29T22:27:00.012Z

Lies, damned lies and...

Since May those nice people at Blogger have been adding statistics to the information I get when I log in to update my blog. So I can now see that over 800 poor lost souls have alighted on this website in the last 6 months (and to them I can only apologise sincerely and hope that I didn't take up too much of their browsing time). The stats also give me the webpages that you clicked through to get here and I'm surprised that people are still visiting our Justgiving India Trek page after all this time (if that's you, then the diary of the trip is in the archive for 2006).
I also get the search terms you type into your search engine, which leaves me with just one question, how the hell did a search of "franciscan mobile home park" get someone to this blog? Google's search ranking system must have seriously cocked up there. OK, two questions: what were they searching for anyway - caravan sites run by monks?

Oh, and it was -7c here this morning. There wasn't a great deal of snow; just enough to make the cotswold stone houses on the way to work look like Christmas card photos.

2010-11-19T01:51:00.000Z

Friday Fun 10

Oh dear God this is funny...

2010-10-17T19:04:00.023Z

Food, glorious food...

This is the result of a rather slow-burn rant and yes, it's going to be long and preachy.

About a month ago, The Guardian published some recipe ideas for students heading off to university under the headline, "Cheap and delicious recipes for student gourmets from some of the country's top chefs, including Gordon Ramsay, Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall and Jamie Oliver". Well, whilst some of the lesser known chefs managed to bring meals in at about £1 a head, Hugh F-W provided a fish recipe that cost £22 and served 4, yes that's £5.50 per serving (Jamie's offering also cost £5.50 a head), and how, by all that is holy, did Gordon Ramsay manage to do macaroni cheese that cost £9.50 (£2.37 a head)? It should only cost £2.50 to make macaroni cheese for 4 people, leaving £7 to spend on beer (we are cooking for students here after all)!

I get really, REALLY, pissed off by some of the commentators who, under the guise of encouraging you to cook from scratch, are actually saying, "Oh but if you can't be bothered to do it properly, with locally sourced organic ingredients, bought from your local farm shop every day, it just isn't real food." So, you might as well not bother and just go back to buying a ready meal to pop in the microwave.

They do the same with ingredients that real people use, because we have real lives going on and can't spend all day tracking down the 'right' soy sauce. Take dried herbs and spices: I've heard 'celebrity' chefs say that if you don't use fresh spices then you really ought not to bother making your own curry because the dried ones (and, even worse, the dried pre-crushed ones) just ruin the flavour. Bollocks. That's fine if you have an Asian food shop on your doorstep, but here in deepest Wiltshire I can't always get even a bunch of fresh coriander in my local supermarket, let alone more exotic things like fenugreek. So instead the chefs try to get you to use one of their own branded bottles of curry paste that cost a fortune and don't last a quarter as long as dried spices in bottles. The only reactions I've ever had to my home-made curries cooked with dried pre-ground cumin, etc, is, "God, that was good, is there enough for seconds?".

Some daft home economist on Woman's Hour a couple of years back was trying to encourage people to avoid the credit crunch by taking their own lunches to work. A very laudable aim, until she said that making your own tuna mayo sarnie would cost about 85p. Wot? So, only about 15p less than a basic supermarket one then? Again, absolute rubbish and seems more intended to put people off making their own rather than encouraging them. For the record, I make 3 rounds of tuna mayo sandwiches for under 90p.

So, although I know virtually no-one with children at university, and those that I do know certainly don't read this blog, for my own satisfaction I'm going to cost up some more sensibly priced student meals. And if any browsing student (or anyone cooking on a budget) happens to come across them, I hope they find them useful. But remember, these are the tips of a 43 year old woman and not necessarily what I actually did when I was at uni! Although we did cook each night for ourselves and if I'd thought I'd be leaving uni with £20k+ of debt I think I'd have been even more careful.

In the beginning...

Right then, let's start at the beginning. ALWAYS have breakfast at home before you leave for the day. Buying stuff on the way to class is expensive, or leaving it 'til mid-morning when you're so starving that you pig out on crisps and chocolate bars is a really bad idea, costly and not healthy. Having brekkie at home saves you money and ensures you can concentrate in class. There are lots of options: cereals (try to avoid ones that turn the milk a different colour or are covered in sugar - but even they are better than nothing); yoghurt and fruit; toast and spreadable topping of your choice; toast and an egg; beans on toast; bacon or sausage sarnie (yeh, like you're going to be up early enough to cook that!). Also, a glass of juice in the morning counts as one of your 5 portions of fruit and veg a day. If you are up too late to eat in the house then grab some fruit to eat on the bus.

Take things for mid-morning and mid-afternoon breaks: fruit, crisps, a re-fillable bottle of water. The most popular branded crisps bought in a multi-bag from the supermarket can cost as little as 9p per bag, compare that to the 45p+ prices of single bags bought from the shop at uni. If you buy just one coffee a day at uni for £2 that's about £360 a year - so just add up what your mid-morning snacks, lunch then mid-afternoon snacks cost you.

Lunch

Yes, I've had the rant about sandwiches above. Making your own lunch will cost less than one third what a shop bought sandwich will (much less, as the campus on which I work does not sell sandwiches for less than £1.50 and most are above £2). You don't have to stop at sandwiches, try wraps, soups or leftovers kept hot in a food flask, salads (tabbouleh, pasta salad, noodle or rice salad using last night's stir fry).

OK, realistically, you're not going to have time to make these in the morning are you? So make them the night before - it'll take 5 mins and save you a fortune. You can even freeze sandwiches (don't put anything on that'll go soggy like tomatoes or cucumber) individually wrapped or in a plastic sandwich box, that you can just take out of the freezer and pop into the 'fridge the night before. Or freeze things when they're on special offer or RFQS (reduced for quick sale) like pasties and pork pies, again just transfer them to the 'fridge the night before.

Any veg you can cram into your lunch will help towards your five a day, even just tomato or celery on your cheese sandwich, cucumber, celery or sweetcorn with tuna, etc.

Dinner

Our culinary bible at uni was Cas Clarke's seminal "Grub on a Grant", but we also had the odd St. Delia and I think I even had a Ken Hom - stirfrys can be very cheap and will use up almost anything in the 'fridge. Don't buy cookery books new; charity shops are full of them, your public library has them by the armful, buy them for a penny on Amazon, surf the web for recipe ideas. Oh, and don't be afraid of ruining your food and wasting money: in the last 25 years I've only made 2 dishes that I considered inedible - one was a potato soup that had the look and consistency of wallpaper paste (that went straight on the compost heap but probably only cost £1 to make) and the other was some pasta/smoked salmon/curry thing using leftovers that I think was supposed to be like kedgeree - it was foul but Jon ate my share before saying, "Please don't make that again".

OK, 7 basic dinner recipes that will feature pasta quite heavily, 'cos it's cheap and filling. I've put 'serves 2' on most of the recipes but just double the ingredients for 4 people, or, if you're cooking for one then just pop half the meal on a plastic box and either freeze it or put into the 'fridge and eat within a couple of days. You can add more rice or pasta if you're hungry and you won't break the bank – you could eat the whole lot yourself without sharing and it won't exactly be expensive! It's easy to think that you can buy a pasta ready-meal in the supermarket for not much more than some of these recipes cost, but you should find that you're making twice as much as you'll get in the supermarket's plastic tray and you also know what's going into your food, so there's no hidden salt, sugar, etc. The only piece of kitchen equipment that you might have to buy is a 'balloon whisk', although if you find that you enjoy cooking (or at least don't hate it) you could buy a cheap liquidiser or hand blender so that you can make soups (from as little as 15p per pint), smoothies, houmous (you can make a vat of this for the price of those little supermarket pots), and so on - supermarkets and Argos sell liquidizers for less than £10 and hand-blenders for under a fiver.

Pasta with tomato sauce - serves 2 - approx cost (depending on how much cheese you have) 75p - that's 37.5p per head.

An extremely simple and cheap recipe for when there's very little in the cupboard. Taken from Elisabeth Luard's wonderful autobiography "Family Life", which also has other great budget recipes as well as being a fantastic read.

150g / 6oz pasta
1 tin tomatoes, roughly chopped
1 clove garlic, peeled and chopped
half teaspoon dried thyme
salt and milled black pepper
grated cheese (cheddar will do, it doesn't have to be posh Italian stuff)

Fry the garlic in a tablespoon of oil for a moment without it changing colour. Add the tomatoes and thyme and let the mixture bubble until you have a nice thick sauce (about 15 minutes). Bring a pan of water to the boil and cook the pasta as directed on the packet. Season the sauce with a pinch of salt and black pepper. Drain the pasta, toss it in the sauce and serve topped with the grated cheese.

This can be adapted by:

1. Putting the pasta and sauce in a shallow oven dish, covering with the cheese and popping in the oven (gas 4, about 180c) until the cheese is bubbly (about 15 mins).
2. Adding some veg to fry with the garlic at the beginning (e.g. any or all of these: half an onion or a celery stick finely chopped, sliced green pepper, sliced mushrooms)
3. Add a couple of slices of chopped bacon to the garlic
4. Add some tinned or frozen sweetcorn and/or a tin of tuna to the tomatoes when they start to bubble.

Pasta bake - this is an unusual recipe in that I only put in it enough ingredients for 2 people but it seems to magically multiply and will serve 3-4, so we always freeze half (take out of the freezer the night before and reheat in a microwave or put into a casserole dish with the lid on in the oven for about 45mins or until piping hot all the way through - gas 5). The price for the tuna and sweetcorn version is around £2.10, so 52.5p per head.

150g / 6oz pasta
185g tin tuna chunks, drained (if they're in oil, drain it into a cup and use it to fry the onion).
1 small onion, finely chopped
1 tin sweetcorn, drained
2 oz/ 55g butter/margarine
2 oz/ 55g plain flour
1 level tsp mustard powder (optional)
large pinch cayenne pepper (optional)
pinch ground nutmeg (optional)
Large pinch salt
1 pint / 460 ml milk (or half milk and half water)
50g - 100g cheddar cheese or similar, grated plus extra for sprinkling on top
Freshly ground black pepper

Cook the pasta as directed on the pack but drain it a couple of minutes before it's completely cooked. Fry the onion in a tablespoon of oil until translucent, not browned. Remove the pan from the heat and add the butter, flour, spices, salt, pepper and milk. Put back on a medium heat and stir with a balloon whisk until the sauce goes thick and glossy and has no lumps in it. Remove from the heat and stir in the majority of the cheese.

In a casserole dish mix together the tuna, sweetcorn, pasta and sauce. Sprinkle the reminder of the cheese over it and cook for about 30 mins in the oven at 200C/Gas 7 until the top is golden and bubbling. Serve with a veg like frozen peas.

This can be adapted by:

1. If you have some old, but not yet blue, bread rub it in your hands (or put into a blender) to make breadcrumbs and mix with the cheese to sprinkle on top - it will make a nice crunchy topping (if you have a breakfast cereal like bran flakes or Weetabix you can use a couple of tablespoons of the crumbs at the bottom of the pack instead of breadcrumbs).
2. For bacon and mushroom bake chop 4 rashers of bacon and fry with the onion - remove them from the pan and put them in the casserole dish before making the sauce. Then slice about 4oz/100g mushrooms and stir into the sauce with the cheese.
3. For chicken add about 6-8 oz/150-200g cooked chicken to the sauce instead of the tuna (or fry raw chicken with the onion and then remove from the pan and put into the casserole dish before making the sauce). Use either mushrooms or sweetcorn.
4. For ham and mushroom, chop about 4 slices of ham and add them and the mushrooms to the sauce with the cheese.

You can now make a cheese sauce (also called roux, Béchamel or white sauce) so things like cauliflower cheese, macaroni cheese, leeks in cheese sauce, lasagne, mornay, proper croque Monsieur should be a doddle.

Stuffed Peppers/Tomatoes - OK, so this one's looking a bit pricey with single peppers currently at 68p and beef tomatoes 57p each, but if you buy a multipack of peppers you could get them down to about 45p each. If you're using peppers then it's best cooked with red, yellow or orange bell peppers and I allow 2 peppers/tomatoes per person. Approx. cost £2.73, so about £1.36 per head, but may be cheaper to make in summer when tomatoes and peppers are plentiful.

4 large peppers or beef tomatoes
1 onion, finely chopped
1 clove garlic, chopped
half a cup of rice
1 tablespoon tomato purée
100g/4 oz cheddar cheese, chopped into cubes, plus a little for sprinkling on the top
basil leaves, torn or 1 teaspoon dried basil
half a pint vegetable stock or water (if you don't have any stock cubes use a level teaspoon of Bovril or Marmite)
Salt and pepper

Slice the top off the pepper, chop it and fry gently with the onion and garlic, until the onion is soft. Add the rice, stock, salt and pepper and, if you're using dried basil, add that too. Simmer gently until the rice is cooked, stirring it towards the end of cooking to ensure that the rice doesn't stick. Remove from the heat and stir in most of the cheese and all the basil leaves (if you're using fresh basil). Spoon into the peppers and top each pepper with the remaining cheese. Cover with foil and cook for 30 mins at Gas 6/200c, uncover and cook at Gas 4/180c for about 30 mins until the cheese is golden.

This can be adapted by:

Trying Simon Hopkinson's brilliant recipe for tomatoes stuffed with rice and lamb taken from The Independent, 7/10/2000

Baked stuffed tomatoes with rice and leftover lamb - Roman style. Serves 4
8 large ripe tomatoes
100g arborio rice
4-5tbsp leftover cooked lamb, finely diced
2tbsp chopped parsley
1 heaped tbsp chopped mint leaves
4 spring onions, trimmed and finely sliced
2 cloves garlic, peeled and finely chopped
salt and pepper
100-120ml olive oil
Preheat the oven to 400F/ 200C/gas mark 6. Slice off the tops of each of the tomatoes - effectively to form lids. Using a teaspoon, scoop out the insides from the tomatoes (try not to pierce their skins) and place the pulp in a colander or sieve suspended over a bowl. Roughly move this pulp about with a spoon so as to drain off most of the liquid. Coarsely chop the flesh, place in a bowl, and mix with the rice, lamb, herbs, onions, garlic, seasoning and half the olive oil. Place the tomatoes in a deep baking dish and then spoon this slop into each of the tomatoes, filling them almost to the brim (there may be a little left over). Now add the collected tomato juice to each tomato until all is used up; it matters not that some might overflow into the dish. Pop their lids back on, anoint each tomato with the remaining olive oil and finish with a light flurry of further seasoning. Cover with foil and bake for 20-25 minutes. Reduce the heat to 350F/180C/gas mark 4, remove foil and continue to cook for a further 25-30 minutes, or until the tomatoes have become well blistered and the rice has swollen to a glistening tenderness. Serve at room temperature.

Tart's Pasta - Serves 2. Pasta 'puttanesca' was apparently named after Neapolitan ladies of the night, although I bet they didn't do much trade after eating this! The ingredients look expensive, but it actually works out at about £1.70, so 85p a head. Vegetarians could leave out the anchovies. I rarely get chance to put olives in this 'cos Jon gets to them first!

150g/6oz pasta
1 x 400g tin tomatoes, roughly chopped
2 cloves garlic, crushed
1 x 50g tin anchovies
100g pitted black olives, chopped
1 fresh red chilli, de-seeded and chopped finely - or use half a teaspoon crushed dried chillies
1 tablespoon capers, drained and rinsed
1 heaped teaspoon dried basil - or 1 dessert spoon chopped fresh basil leaves
freshly ground black pepper

Drain the oil from the anchovies into a pan and in it fry the garlic and chilli until the garlic begins to brown at the edges. Add all the other ingredients, put the lid on the pan and turn the heat down. Simmer until the sauce is very thick - about 40 mins. Cook the pasta as directed on the packet, drain, then toss it in the sauce. Serve with grated cheese, preferably parmesan, Grana Padano or Pecorino Romano - but cheddar is fine.

Cheat's Carbonara - serves 2 for about £1.44 if using Italian cheese (72p a head) but would cost less if you used cheddar. You can leave out either the bacon, or the mushrooms, depending on what you have in the 'fridge. Ham can be substituted for the bacon.

150g/6oz pasta
2 rashers of bacon, chopped
4 or 5 mushrooms, sliced
4 tablespoons (approx 40g) of Italian cheese like parmesan, Grana Padano or Pecorino Romano - but cheddar is also fine - grated
1 egg
4 tablespoons (approx 60ml) single cream or crème fraiche (or double/whipping cream or cream cheese)
freshly milled black pepper

Cook the pasta as directed on the packed and drop the mushrooms into the water to cook with the pasta. Mix the cheese, egg, cream and pepper together. Drain the pasta and mushrooms into a colander and in the pan heat a tablespoon of oil or butter and fry the bacon until cooked (about 5 mins). Put the pasta and mushrooms back into the pan and stir them around for a couple of minutes to come back up to temperature. Remove the pan from the heat and stir in the sauce. Return the pan to the lowest possible heat and keep stirring until the cheese has melted. Serve with extra grated cheese to sprinkle over.

Dahi Murghi - a pretty easy curry recipe. Putting meat in a recipe immediately pushes up the price, but luckily more economical cuts of meat are usually much tastier than the more expensive ones! Exotic things like ginger keep for ages in the 'fridge and can be used in stirfrys. Serves 4 and costs approximately £4.80, so £1.20 a head, including rice..

400g / 1lb skinless chicken thigh fillets, chopped
150g pot of plain/natural yoghurt
2 cloves garlic, crushed
2.5 cm piece root ginger, peeled and grated or finely chopped
2 red chillies and 2 green chillies, chopped finely, or half a teaspoon (more if you like it hotter) of dried chilli flakes.
Half a teaspoon of ground turmeric
2 teaspoons ground coriander
1 large onion sliced into half-moon slices
(1 green or red pepper, sliced - optional)
Salt & ground black pepper
Half a teaspoon of garam masala
2 tablespoons (1 small pack) fresh coriander leaves, chopped

Curries are best marinated for a few hours or overnight to let the flavours develop, but if you forget don't worry, just start the recipe from 'Heat the oil...'. To be honest, if I remember to marinate it the night before then I'll cook the onions as well, add them to the marinade when they've cooled and then the following evening everything just goes into a casserole dish in the oven for 1 hour at gas 4.

Put the chicken in a large non-metallic bowl with the yoghurt, garlic, chillies, ginger, turmeric and ground coriander. Mix thoroughly, cover and leave in the 'fridge for 6 hours, or overnight. When you're ready to cook the curry heat the oil in a large pan and fry the onions until browned. Remove the chicken from the marinade, reserve the marinated and add the chicken to the pan. Cook the chicken for 5 mins until starting to brown. Add the marinade (and green pepper, if you're using it), cover and cook gently for 30 mins until the chicken is tender. Add the salt and pepper, garam masala and cook for a further 5 mins. Stir in the coriander leaves and serve with boiled rice.

Green fettuccine with tuna - well, actually, you can use whatever pasta you like and the recipe originally said 'salmon'. Serves 2. The wine bumps the cost of this up to about £1.84, so 92p a head. Buy the cheapest resealable bottle/carton of white wine possible and it'll keep for ages - you probably wouldn't want to drink a glass of it, but it will be fine for cooking with.

1 small onion, finely chopped
1 clove garlic, crushed
1 tablespoon tomato puree
pinch cayenne pepper
200ml/7 fl oz white wine
140ml/5fl oz single cream or crème fraiche
185g tin tuna chunks, drained (if it's in oil, use the oil to fry the onion)

Heat a tablespoon of oil in a pan and soften the onion and garlic. Add the tomato purée, cayenne and wine and simmer for 5 mins until reduced by half. Cook the pasta as directed on the packet. Add the cream and tuna to the onion mixture and simmer for a couple of minutes. Drain the pasta and toss it on the hot sauce and serve.

In conclusion...

So, that's two people fed for 7 nights for £11.91. I could go on with the recipes, but I'm sure I've made my point: cooking for yourself is cheaper than ready meals, let alone take aways, and you shouldn't be put off by poncy chefs feeding you duff infromation.

Shopping carefully and a little forward planning are probably the keys to cheap eating:

* never going shopping without a shopping list. Check out what's in the 'fridge, freezer and cupboards as you write it so that you avoid waste. Do a rough list of the meals you can make with the ingredients as you go.

* be open to special offers and RFQS bargains and be prepared to change your meal ideas if you can find cheaper ingredients.

* supermarkets are not always the cheapest place to shop: the green grocer may have cheaper fruit and veg; the market (and we're talking traditional markets here, not farmers' markets) may have cheaper veg, cheese, meat, fish; and ethnic food shops (Asian/Chinese/etc) cheaper spices, sauces, veg, rice, and so on. A good butcher may not be more expensive than the supermarket, and may also be selling locally raised meat. And people are often happy to tell you the best ways to cook what you buy, advise you on amounts to cook, and so on. Turn food shopping into a social experience rather than a chore.

* don't be addicted to brands – the supermarket's 'value' ranges are often just as good but are a fraction of the price, for example the leading brand of bran flakes is £2.29 for 750g, whilst the supermarket's value brand is 78p for 750g and even their regular bran flakes are £1.58 for 1kg. They all taste the same so are the branded ones really 3 times better? The same goes for cleaning products, kitchen roll, etc. Read Martin Lewis's 'Down-Shift Challenge' on supermarket shopping. All the recipes above were costed using non-branded goods where possible. If you're label conscious, just buy a plastic box to decant the product into - you'll be saving so much money that buying the odd Tupperware box won't even register on your budget.

* avoid waste by not buying more than you need and by using up items that are about to spoil – make soups or stirfrys from those dodgy veggies in the bottom of the 'fridge, add them to a stew, make smoothies from fruit that's over-ripe, or chop them and freeze them – lots of websites have ideas for using up things lurking at the back of the 'fridge, try this forum.

* you don't have to spend every night slaving over a hot stove: several of these meals can be assembled in advance (with the pasta bake, just make sure that all the cooked ingredients and sauce are cold before you assemble it) and either frozen or put in the 'fridge ready to go into the oven when you get home, for example the stuffed peppers/tomatoes, pasta bake, curry and the tart's pasta sauce (just reheat that in a saucepan whilst the pasta is cooking). So an hour's preparation on an afternoon when you have the time to spend could give you 4 meals that will barely need any time spending on them later - just the cooking of rice, pasta or a veg to go with some of them.

Right, I think I'm ranted out now, and I never even got onto smoked salmon and cream cheese bagels or tiger prawn linguine! Well, perhaps next time...

2010-10-15T07:35:00.000Z

Friday Fun 9

Jasper Carrot's account of his first time in Hong Kong, eating at an 'authentic' Chinese restaurant. I had to be helped back onto the sofa when I first heard this on TV all those years ago and I still cry with laughter.

2010-09-18T20:49:00.014Z

Vroom vroom

We've had some great motorsporty weekends recently: the bikes at Castle Combe a couple of weeks ago; Thruxton and then the Castle Combe Rally Day earlier today.

The CSMA Big Weekend at the Dunlop Great and British round at Thruxton on the August Bank Holiday weekend was great fun - well anything with a 'Jazz and Ale Tent' has got to be good hasn't it? With our tickets we got a 15 min karting session and a trip on the 4X4 track. We flipped for it and Jon got the Karting. The track was great with bridges, underpasses, etc and he had a great time. The 4x4 track was awesome - I thought I'd be terrified but it was brilliant. Note to self: I must buy myself a driving session at the Castle Combe version.

Today's Rally Day at Castle Combe was excellent and this time the weather was perfect. Tony Mason was doing the interviews as usual - and here he is interviewing Jari-Matti Latvala. What a glamorous life these rally stars have: last week 3rd in Rally Japan, this week Chippenham! Stig Blomqvist, Gwyndaf Evans, Guy Wilks and Russell Brookes were also in attendance.

Speaking of Mr Brookes; there was a parade of his cars which included one I'd last seen in about 1979 at a Wigan and District Motor Club show - I believe it was the Mark II Escort TWC 234R. As you can see it was fresh from a rally, and yes, that really is me inside. I seem to remember that his manager, who accompanied the car, got rather merry on the hospitality.

As if to prove that it really is a small world: another link to the Wigan and District Motor Club (of which my Dad, an amateur rally driver/navigator, was a member) was this car, a little black Nissan Micra, which - it turns out - belongs to a friend of a friend. Sadly, it didn't go home looking like this as they rolled it about 20 mins before the end of the day. Sorry, I didn't get a photo of it on its roof before the marshalls pushed it back over, but here it is on the trailer. After a really quite accident-free day everyone seemed to get a bit leery at the end and no sooner had they been allowed back on track than two others
spun off and halted the proceedings again. I wouldn't be surprised if the Castle Combe faithful had photos up on here soon. All my photos are, as usual, over in the photo album on the right - look in 'Motorsport Summer 2010'. There'll be a 1 hour programme on the Rally Day on Motors TV 22nd October at 21.15 - set your videos!

2010-09-08T07:19:00.011Z

My Hero

I don't have many heroes because most people in the public eye are as flawed as the rest of us, or more so. I suppose Clive Stafford-Smith comes close or Hester Stanhope, but I think Camila Batmanghelidjh probably encapsulates who I would like to be if I were a better person.

Brought up in an amazingly wealthy Iranian family, Ms Batmanghelidjh and her siblings were at school in England when the revolution happened and they lost touch with their parents. With the help of her school she managed to get asylum and then worked in nurseries to fund her way through university. For some reason she'd always wanted to work with disadvantaged children and did that as a psychotherapist, first working with the children the wealthy and then working with the sort of kids who get referred to Social Services.

In 1996 Ms Batmanghelidjh set up Kids Company to help the children we ignore until they get into the headlines of tabloid newspapers as the victims, or perpetrators, of violence. Around the same time one prominent comedian was developing his catch-phrase of, "Tough on crime, tough on the causes of crime" and, whilst I remember him eventually slapping an asbo on anyone who couldn't run away fast enough, I recall him doing precious little about the last part of that phrase. Disadvantage (not just financial poverty, but poverty of expectation, a lack of family support, poverty of ambition) and the other myriad causes of crime and social disaffection, was not tackled on a national level. Throughout the period since 1996 social inequality got worse, with the richest and poorest moving further apart (IFS Report), whilst social mobility has also declined (Sutton Trust/Guardian) - so if you're born on a sink estate in Doncaster, you're more likely to remain there.

So, thank goodness someone decided to do what she could to help these children. When the crimes they commit reach the headlines we are rightly disgusted, but the backgrounds they come from should really turn our stomachs. She works with children who have been the subject of abuse and/or neglect since infancy, whose parents often have their own mental or substance dependency problems and cannot/will not care for them so that the parent-child relationship is either reversed, or the child goes 'feral'. One story: "She tells me of a boy who came to her aged 12. He had already stabbed his stepfather for attacking his mother. Both were crack addicts and the boy, always fearful, slept with knives under his pillow. He was a terrifying, angry child, she recalls. But she persisted: “I’d follow him around and sit next to him and say ‘You’re too cute to frighten me!’” Gradually his story unfolded, the beatings, neglect, the gun put in his mouth by a junkie. But what kept the boy coming to Kids Co was that it understood his mind, his urge to switch from victim of violence to perpetrator, how only torturing and persecuting others gave him mental relief." (Timesonline). Now aged 22 the young man is at college, studying for a professional qualification.

This story is by far not the worst: a quick Google will bring up the life-histories of other children that she's told to various newspapers. Is it any wonder that some of these children will turn to abusing others to re-capture a sense of power or respect that is missing from their lives; or will join a gang because it gives them a surrogate family that's probably less abusive than their own? Many years ago I read one report in which Ms Batmanghelidjh estimated that up to 40% of the children on some London housing estates were 'lost' - not in school, not contacted by Social Services, no GP, left to fend for themselves. What happens to these children as adults? What sort of families and relationships do they go on to have? Of course with many of them we know that they end up in the criminal justice system, or their children end up in care, but what about the rest? What effects is the abuse they suffered in childhood having on the next generation and on wider society?

The great thing is that many of the children themselves self-refer to Kids Company, or bring in friends that they think are in trouble. They realise that their lives shouldn't be like that and they find help. Of these, 96% return to education or employment and there's an 88% reduction in crime (Independent) - back to that phrase of "tough on the causes of crime" again. And that's why it's important that we don't leave the most disadvantaged in society to fend for themselves, because the effects end up permeating through society as a whole: your car gets broken into to support someone's drug habit; you're frightened to walk down a street because of the gang on the corner; crime ends up being the only job for the kid who can't read or write (illiteracy rates of those who end up in prison have changed little since the turn of the 19th century). With cuts in public spending which are going to hit services to the disadvantaged most, sadly, people like Camila Batmanghelidjh will become more important. Isn't it sad that in the 4th richest country on the planet we still have a level of people whose lives are so blighted, with a blight that infects future generations?

If I were a better, braver, more patient person (or liked children) I'd volunteer for such work myself, but I'll have to content myself with making donations to charity and looking with awe at one of my heroes. I do also envy her dress sense, 'larger than life' character and the entrepreneurial spirit that enabled her to establish her various ventures. After all, (to misquote Caitlin Moran) someone with 'Batman' in her name can probably do just about anything!

2010-08-27T07:19:00.001Z

Friday Fun 8

'Lollipop'. We've had a child called Lollipop join the organisation I work for. No, seriously, we have. Put me in mind of this from Jasper Carrot.

2010-08-04T08:25:00.003Z

A round up of books read in the last year:

1. Are You Looking at Me, Jimmy? Arnold Brown
2. Swimming to Cambodia Spalding Grey
3. Round About a Pound a Week Maud Pember-Reeves
4. The Condition of the Working Class in England Frederick Engels
5. The Thrift Book: Live Well and Spend Less India Knight
6. The English Rebel: One Thousand Years of Trouble-making from the Normans to the Nineties David Horspool
7. Death in the Stocks Georgette Heyer
8. Bright Young People: The Rise and Fall of a Generation 1918-1940 D J Taylor
9. The Classic Slum: Salford Life in the First Quarter of the Century Robert Roberts
10. Footsteps in the Dark Georgette Heyer
11. Soul Music: A Discworld Novel Terry Pratchett
12. We Danced All Night: A Social History of Britain Between the Wars Martin Pugh
13. Why Shoot a Butler? Georgette Heyer
14. Night Watch: A Discworld Novel Terry Pratchett
15. A Radical History of Britain: Visionaries, Rebels and Revolutionaries - The Men and Women Who Fought for Our Freedoms Edward Vallance
16. The Unfinished Clue Georgette Heyer
17. Men at Arms: A Discworld Novel Terry Pratchett (re-read)
18. The Gangs of Manchester: the story of the scuttlers, Britain's first youth cult" Andrew Davies
19. Behold, Here's PoisonGeorgette Heyer (re-read)
20. Your Inner Fish: The amazing discovery of our 375-million-year-old ancestor Neil Shubin
21. Pyramids: A Discworld Novel Terry Pratchett

2010-07-23T18:54:00.003Z

Oooo, I've never worked for an organisation that had its own stamp before! I first saw this about a year ago but we were sworn to secrecy and the Royal Mail have finally launched it today. Exciting, egh?

2010-07-12T07:45:00.002Z

Friday Fun 7

A colleague sent me this 'cos she said it reminded her of Jon! She's only met him once, so the impression he made must have been startling!

We can see where she's coming from, but this blog cannot condone the wearing of facial hair.

There are loads more on YouTube by the Gentleman Rhymer, the country's leading exponent of 'Chap-Hop', including him doing 'All Hail the Chap' at the Lass o'Gowrie*, Manchester (ah, brings back memories) - enjoy...

Oh, and, don't forget that it's the 4th Chap Olympiad this weekend. We won't be there 'cos we're hosting Mr Oscar, but it should be great fun.

* The book I'm reading at the moment, Andrew Davies' The Gangs of Manchester, gives this description of the Lass in the 1870s, "'No pen could describe' the fearful state of the hovels of Deansgate, where the Hop Pole Inn...was frequented by 'the very lowest dregs of society'...The district between Oxford Road and London Road was little better...One man was seen entering the Lass o'Gowrie on Charles Street 'with nothing on but his shirt and shoes'. The observers noted that 'A fearful state of demoralization exists about this house'".

2010-07-08T17:48:00.004Z

Track Day June 2010

Just before we went on holiday we did a ride-out with the local police followed by a scoot round the track at Combe. Well, Jon did the scoot round the track and I chicken'd out! The photos, taken by this chap, are on our photo album on the right.

2010-07-04T19:29:00.022Z

Ferrets on Tour

We're just back from taking the motorbikes on a trip to Germany; which entailed going through 5 countries (I did hope we'd go through Luxembourg to make it 6 but we just went round the top of it instead) and travelling 1,620 miles - that's more than my bike has ever done in an entire year before! After putting off doing a bike trip for the last 3 summers because the weather has been so awful, this year we decided to just book it and go whatever the weather did. It worked and after drizzle on the first few days the weather was good for the rest of the holiday - if a bit too hot towards the end!

This shows the danger of getting satellite TV, as we were inspired by Henry Cole's 'World's Greatest Motorcycle Rides' on the Travel Channel. But he did make it look a lot easier than it actually was - probably 'cos he has a camera crew help him navigate! Below is Google Maps' suggested route - I can't say that we stuck to it though. We wanted to do some of the 'Castle Route' and the 'Romantic Route', but also ended up doing bits of the Mosel Wine Route and the Nibelung-Sigefried Route too. You know the Germans - they even organise their tourists! Reviews of all the hotels we stayed in can be found on Trip Advisor, well, if they publish some of the rather more scathing ones that is...

View German Trip June 2010 in a larger map

Day -1 - Friday night

We decided to break the journey to Dover by staying in the Premier Inn at Slough on the Friday night. I now heartily agree with John Betjeman's assessment of the place and it's down there with Croydon as one of the most charmless places I've ever been to. It started to rain as we got stuck in the one-way system whilst following the, frankly rubbish, directions from the hotel's website. This set the tone for journey, as we knew every day when we were nearing our destination because it would either start raining or there'd be a road diversion that would add at least half an hour to our journey! I think June must be national road works month in Germany.

Day 1 - Saturday

This stop-over roughly halved our journey to Dover, so we had plenty of time to get there on Saturday and didn't have to rush or worry about getting lost. The ferries now have proper motorcycle parking bays, which is a great innovation since we last travelled to France. They used to just lash the bike to the wall of the car deck, using a manky bit of foam to protect the bike's paintwork from the ropes. If you were lucky a member of staff would do this for you, but you were on your own once you'd docked. Now you drive through a ramp into a metal thingie that grips your front wheel whilst it's strapped down using the back frame. Staff insist on doing this and undoing it once we docked.

Our first destination on the Continent was the Pomme D'Or in Oudenaarde, Belgium. This was a bit ambitious but should have been easily do-able in a reasonable amount of time. But the cross-winds on leaving Calais and heading up to Dunkirk were extraordinary, and after an hour or so of counter-steering (and diversions) I couldn't hold the bike up any more and we had to find a different route. So we dropped down to Wipers/Ypres/Ieper and across country. It was very affecting driving past little knots of graves in tiny graveyards by the side of the road, all beautifully tended by the War Graves Commission - and the names themselves: 'Tyne Cot' Cemetery, 'Irish Farm' Cemetery and 'Colne Valley' Cemetery are so evocative of the groups of men from a single town or borough who joined up together and all too often died together. The sheer number of these graveyards in the Ieper area (the Western Front) is just as awful (in the true sense of the word) as the acres of graves in one single place at the Menin Gate.

Anyway, the diversion added several hours to our journey and we reached the Pomme D'Or at 9pm tired and rather grumpy. But the hotel was lovely and even had a decanter of port in the room - free! - which was extremely welcome. It has a lovely brasserie attached and a very elegant restaurant. Unfortunately, as it was raining, we couldn't go out onto the terrace bar, but we enjoyed the food and Belgian beers in the brasserie. It was such a great place that we were sad to only stay for one night.

Day 2 - Sunday

The next destination was the Ibis in Aachen (Aix-la-Chapelle), Germany. If you're trying to remember why you've heard of Aachen, it was the site of Charlemagne's main palace, there was a treaty signed here at the end of the Napoleonic Wars and it was the first German town to be captured by the Allies in WW2. Oh, and there's a link to Chippenham too, as Alfred the Great's father was born there!

We got horribly lost in Aachen trying to find the hotel (actually, we got horribly lost trying to get out of Belgium too! We were so grateful to the van driver who stopped to help us when we had the map out) - my fault I'm afraid - but finally landed about 4pm. All Ibis hotels are pretty standard, but I really liked this one, it looked out over trees and one of the city's old entrance gates was in the road just below it. Luckily, the cathedral is open 'til 7pm, so plenty of time for late sight-seeing.

Days 3 & 4 - Monday & Tuesday

The next day we headed for the Ibis in Heidelberg, for two nights this time. I've got to say that on the whole German drivers were very considerate to us poor lost bikers, who were probably more like mobile chicanes! The proximity to the Nurburgring meant that there were some fast cars around. Oh, and for any Top Gear fans, Germany is full of Dacia Sanderos. We decided today to get off the autobahn and take the A9 which runs down the Rhine (as recommended by someone at work who'd been stationed out there) and it was such a great road. We stopped at Boppard for lunch (Gulaschsuppe (Goulash Soup) our favourite!), but could have stopped anywhere en-route as there were such beautiful castles and towns by the road that you wanted to stop and take pictures, but there were just so many of them that you'd never get anywhere! There were also vines growing everywhere, not just on fields by the side of the road but on almost vertical hills above the road too. That was quite a long run (more getting lost). But we did find some lovely 'biking' roads that were virtually empty. We found all week that many roads were really quiet and even on A-roads we could be the only things going in our direction for miles at a stretch.

Again it was about 9pm by the time we were out of the hotel and looking for food; which was found in Zapata's next door to the hotel - Jon made the mistake of going for the special offer on the schnitzel. The restaurant had a South American theme, hence the name, so they had Argentinian beef on the menu - not that Germany doesn't produce plenty of its own, as we could smell the bi-products on the way down! All I can say is that the Germans use a lot of natural fertilisers on their fields.

The next day we used the excellent public transport system to get to Hiedelberg Castle - there's a funicular railway to get up there! Wooo Wooo Wooo!!!! There's an apothecary museum, which was very interesting as there was laudanum, cocaine and absinthe; and that was just in the café! ;¬) The castle is also home to the Heidelberg Tun, a huge barrel that was scorned by Mark Twaine in 'A Tramp Abroad', "Everybody has heard of the great Heidelberg Tun, and most people have seen it, no doubt. It is a wine-cask as big as a cottage, and some traditions say it holds eighteen hundred thousand bottles, and other traditions say it holds eighteen hundred million barrels. I think it likely that one of these statements is a mistake, and the other is a lie. However, the mere matter of capacity is a thing of no sort of consequence, since the cask is empty, and indeed has always been empty, history says. An empty cask the size of a cathedral could excite but little emotion in me. I do not see any wisdom in building a monster cask to hoard up emptiness in, when you can get a better quality, outside, any day, free of expense".

The old town was also lovely. This is going to sound a bit odd, but one result of us bombing the crap out of nice German towns during the war is that it gave the churches the chance to invest in some really innovative stained glass in the post war period. We saw some lovely windows in the Franciscan church in Rothenburg and saw this in Heidelberg.

A real find was the restaurant in the garden that the Kurpfalzisches Museum in the Old Town - and that the western regions of Germany do flammkuchen like they make it in Strasbourg... mmmm, delish. The garden was really quiet and the restaurant not expensive and open 'til 11pm.

Days 5 & 6 - Wednesday and Thursday

The next day we set off to Rothenburg ob der Tauber. We used the autobahn until Bad Wimpfen, were we stopped to do a bit of sight seeing. Actually, you could stop in any small town along the route and you'd see half-timbered mediaeval quaintness a-plenty, it seemed quite difficult to find an ugly town in this region! We saw some amazing birds of prey whilst riding along. They were about the same size as buzzards but flew lower than buzzards do, one flew along side us in the field for a hundred yards or so, whilst another time one flew along in front of Jon.

Then we took the the pretty roads to Rothenburg, which included the customary diversions dictated by road works and us getting lost. Riding into Rothenburg on cobbles through the tower pictured above was amazing - like riding into a mediaeval theme park. I'm glad that I didn't have to tackle those cobbles in the wet. I don't think I've ever been in a town which is still so completely within its mediaeval walls. Bits of the town are closed to traffic during the day, but luckily vehicles going to and from the hotels are exempt from those rules. It's a shame that the 'welcome' we got in the hotel spolied the entire holiday for me. Read about it on Trip Advisor, if the review is still there, because the owner has already had my review removed from the website we booked it through!

The covered town walls were fantastic, sorry if you get bored of all the photos of them in the album. There were lots of churches to look round but we didn't get chance to do the museums because the town itself was just so wonderful to wander around. They even brew their own beers... Which were available at the Gerhaus Hotel. The venison goulash and the flamm at the Reichs Kutchenmeister were scrummy.

Day 7 - Friday

We left Rothenberg via the Klingentor gate (pictured right) and headed off on the pretty roads back to Worms and ran into diversions immediately! This led to us getting very lost in the middle of nowhere, but the Germans were so unfailingly helpful (even on occasions when we didn't actually need help!) that a young girl stopped her car to give us directions. That set us on the right path and we were in Worms for about 4pm. I've got to say that German road signs were rubbish, with towns appearing and disappearing from them seemingly at random!

Worms is one of the oldest cities in Germany and is famous to every spotty school child for its Diet. In 1521 the Diet of Worms declared Martin Luther an outlaw because he would not recant his religious beliefs - there's a very large statue of him in one of the little parks. William Tyndale's first complete edition of the New Testament in English was also printed in Worms in 1526. We were rather unimpressed by Worms, but perhaps we didn't find the nice bit! We visited the cathedral but couldn't find anything else nice to look round, but it is difficult when you've only got a few hours in a town. But we found a good restaurant and a nice bar (Cafe Pinel).

Day 8 - Saturday

We headed off for Bitburg, where the beer comes from. They do tours of the brewery, but we didn't have the time unfortunately. This was quite close to the Nurburgring so again there were some interesting cars and bikes around. There were lots of twisty roads on the way there, which Jon loved, but me less so and not helped by coming across the most ignorant road-users of the week: a group of about 8 British lads on sports bikes who overtook us and lots of other traffic on a series of blind hairpin bends down a steep hill. In fact, one of them almost didn't make it back in in time near me and I thought I was going to be spending the rest of the day scraping bits of him off my leathers and explaining to the German police that this tw*t may have been English but was nothing to do with us.

Day 9 - Sunday

We skirted the top of Luxembourg and made our way back into Belgium. Immediately the driving became somehow more, well, French (apologies to our French friends), with tail-gating and cars overtaking a line of stationary traffic in the face of on-coming traffic! As it was a Sunday there were shoals of lycra-clad cyclists three abreast across the road, it was like being in "Belleville Rendez-vous". There were lots of vintage cars, obviously on a rally, as well as a group of identical BMW Minis all hunting for petrol. Because, of course, this was France/Belgium on a Sunday and everywhere was closed, including the petrol stations. We've had this on previous trips and should have remembered to fill up the day before, but in Britain we get so used to a 24/7 culture that you just forget that our neighbours aren't the same. There were thousands of bikers on the road and when you did go past a petrol station that was open it was packed with bikers chatting and admiring each other's machines. Very sociable.

Our destination was the Chateau de Namur, a very posh-looking establishment on the hill above the Citadel. We approached it up a steep cobbled switchback road that led to the Citadel - everywhere we went this holiday seemed to have cobbles and hairpin bends! It turned out to be rather too quirky but the food was excellent. It was too far from the centre of Namur (and far too hot at 30 degrees c) to do sight-seeing, but I think the town would repay a visit, it looked interesting.

Day 10 - Monday

Today was a run up to the Ibis in St Omer, only about 30 miles from Calais, so a nice overnight stop within hailing distance of the ferry. We'd barely seen any Brits all holiday, so it was a bit of a shock to find that seemingly everyone in St Omer was British! Those that weren't were obviously also doing a stop-over before catching the ferry. All the English speaking people we'd heard in Germany were American - there were thousands of them! Rothenburg was packed with them. But there were quite a few US bases around so I wondered if some were visiting relatives or re-visiting old haunts.

Anyway, St Omer was very nice, with a cathedral built of brilliant white stone (well, half of it was, as it's in the process of being cleaned!). Inside, what we at first thought was a housemartin flying near the roof actually turned out to be a bat! Bats in the belfry indeed... We avoided the bars with names like "The Queen Victoria", "Dickens" and "Le Penalty" but had the 16 euro menu at Le P'tit Montmartre, whose chef must have Michelin pretentions as the food was fantastically presented for something at that price. Sadly, no air-con in the bedroom and it was baking!

Day 11 - Tuesday - Home

A very quiet crossing with few vehicles on the ferry. Made it back from Dover in 4 hours and that included a tea break. There was an accident at our M4 junction so we got off at Wootton Bassett and came home via Sutton Benger. It was a lovely run with very little traffic and we were really glad to have such a nice ride so close to home.

It was a difficult holiday with the getting lost becoming very wearing. I think next time we might go less far and spend two nights at more places rather than moving on most days, as the 2 stints of two nights spent at Heidelberg and Rothenberg were more relaxing. But Germany and the Germans were lovely and we'd love to go back.

But we must have slipped into an alternate universe on the ferry home 'cos we got back to find the Conservatives saying that we should send fewer people to prison and use more community sentences. What happened? They've gone left at a speed that makes New Labour's 1995 move to the right look positively pedestrian. They'll be digging up Disraeli and bringing back One Nation Toryism next and then I'll have to vote for them! (Only joking - Satan will have to buy ice skates first).

2010-06-15T19:27:00.006Z

Henry Surtees was only 18 when he died in a racing accident almost a year ago - only a few weeks after we'd taken this photo of him driving one of his Dad's old GP cars up the Hill Climb at Goodwood Festival of Speed. A talented up-and-coming racing driver, Henry was following in his father's footsteps, well, probabbly not all of them as his Dad remains the only person to have won world championships on both 2- and 4-wheels.

Anyway, Henry's school friends are swimming the English Channel next week in Henry's memory to raise funds for the Surtees family's nominated charity, Headway, which helps those with brain injuries. Yes, you did read that right, they are SWIMMING THE ENGLISH CHANNEL! Their Just Giving page is here if you'd like to donate. If you're reading this after the Just Giving site has closed, please click on the word Headway above to go to their donations site.

2010-06-11T13:11:00.002Z

Friday Fun 6

Whenever life gets you down, Mrs. Brown,
And things seem hard or tough,
And people are stupid, obnoxious or daft,
And you feel that you've had quite enough,

Just remember...

And pray that there's intelligent life somewhere out in space,
'Cos there's bugger all down here on Earth!

2010-06-01T20:45:00.004Z

2010 Goals Update

I posted some goals in January, and I just thought I'd look at them again to see how I was doing.

They were:

1. re-mortgage in Feb when our 10 year fixed rate ends
2. over-pay mortgage to allow us to pay it off early
3. do at least one long motorbike holiday this year, even if it does rain all summer, again
4. get more exercise

So, 1 & 2 - we've re-mortgaged. The chat with the mortgage girlie was very positive, in that her figures matched the ones we'd worked out before-hand, so that was good.

3. Have booked a ferry and the first 2 nights' accommodation of a bike trip to Germany before the schools break up for the summer. So expect the nice weather to end soon and it start raining!

4. Have moved offices at work and it is slightly easier to walk up the stairs now! We have been trying to get out for a walk round Dyrham Park or to walk to Lacock on a weekend. Training walks with Claire as she prepared for her trek helped too. But could do better.

There's been some progress toward the goals I set myself for the next 10 years:

1. pay off mortgage in 2012 (13 years early) On track, but it'll be 2013 instead. We will have paid off the mortgage in 3.5 years - 12 years early and only 23 years after we took out the mortgage on our first house.
2. travel more – possibly by volunteering on archaeological/environmental projects
3. perhaps do more studying
4. work less I think this and no.s 2 and 3 will be more do-able once 1 is sorted.
5. enjoy life more
6. do more draft/scary things to prove I’m still alive
7. use the motorbikes more – preferably abroad, preferably Libya, Iceland and Morocco Trip to Germany planned. Although we've mostly enjoyed our trips abroad in the last couple of years, we've REALLY hated the flying - airports and airlines seem to do all they can to make travel as unpleasant as possible. So I think that our hols for the next few years will be on bikes and trains (hence the rail map of Europe I got for my birthday).

5 and 6 still need a lot more work!

2010-05-27T09:03:00.000Z

Inspiration

I've posted before about the excellent naming choices of some car and bike manufacturers for their new vehicles. Obviously, there's something about this name that signifies taste, elegance and modernity, unlike other names like... oh I don't know... I'll just pluck one out of the air... perhaps 'Jonathan'.

Well, here's another one - from Ford this time. Let's hope that it doesn't remain a 'concept' for too long as I don't think the British public should be denied a car with such an illustrious moniker.

Although, even I have to admit, that this name can't compete with Mazda's 'Bongo Friendee' (also sold as the Ford 'Freda'). But that risks tipping the post over into one about camper vans, so I should probably end it there!

2010-04-29T18:04:00.005Z

Happy Birthday to me...

Considering I was at work yesterday I had a really rather nice birthday.

I got some good books:

Andrew Davies's "The Gangs of Manchester";
Tom Robb Smith's "The Secret Speech";
Neil Shubin's "Your Inner Fish";
Ian Hough's "Perry Boys";
David Kynaston's huge "Family Britain 1951-57" which was chosen on the way home from the beer festival, which probably explains the slight over-ambition!
Thomas Cook Rail Map of Europe.
Plus The Human League's "Travalogue" as I'm trying to catch up on all those LPs I should have bought in the '80s.

And some Irish linen sheets I'd ordered also turned up, so they felt like a birthday present to me, from me!

Although I was in work, I didn't do very much yesterday afternoon because Chris Evans and a sidekick were having a go on the Skeleton training track for some sporting challenge that they're doing on his radio show. So we decided to go over and "help out" despite neither of us actually being interested in Mr Evans or his antics (my colleague has spent most of her adult life outside the UK and had to have Mr Evans and his cultural significance explained). We took an auditor over there with us too, as he was just finishing up and decided that he didn't want to be locked in the office.

The producer (or maybe she was a representative of his agent*) was getting a bit skittish when we arrived - she didn't seem to have much of a sense of humour and what there was seemed to be exiting rapidly. So my colleague volunteered to watch the gate for 'intruders' and keep an eye on the local press photographers at the far end of the track. I baby-sat the auditor at the top of the track and kept him out of everyone's way, as they were filming the event for the radio show's website as well. This strategy was going quite well until Mr Evans found our hidey hole and insisted on shaking hands and asking how we were. I've got to say that I responded with grace and aplomb whilst the auditor went into, "I'm your biggest fan" mode. A short while later the stars were coming into the shed to change into their lycra suits ('sperm suits' one of our coaches calls them) at which point I decided that the auditor was big enough to fend for himself and I volunteered to relieve my colleague guarding the gate - middle aged men, commando under lycra are not my idea of a happy viewing experience.

Actually, she didn't want to be relieved 'cos she was having great fun chatting to the photographer and scribe from the Chron. and the photographer from a Sunday tabloid. It turned out to be quite a good vantage point as it's just where the bungee rope stops the sled from flying off the end of the track, and instead flicks it and its passenger back up the track. I've got to say that Mr Evans' face was a picture on the first practice run, not quite, 'Ooo, I'm enjoying this adrenaline rush as I hurtle toward the trees on a bit of plastic 2 inches above the concrete'. It was more the face of a man pondering how much stainage shows up on lycra and resolving to check his employment contract and medical insurance cover once he got back to London. If he got back to London. I bet they never asked Wogan to do this...

He looked far happier on subsequent runs and the Chron got some cracking shots - click here and search on 'chris evans'. Our photos are in the album over on the right. After the two stars had done their training runs and then their 2 final 'competition' runs, the crew were allowed to have one run each (not in lycra, but they did have crash helmets!). All of them were very quick and one of the lads was really good - there were a couple of half-jokes from us to him about whether he'd like to come to a talent id day. The auditor left early, shaking hands, waving and doing the thumbs up to Mr Evans as if he was his new best friend. Well, I suppose accountants don't get out much.

I've got to say that Chris Evans turned out to be a very nice chap. He even came over to us to say good-bye and when I asked if he'd enjoyed it said he had, but that he was a bit miffed that ALL the film crew had beaten both his and Jonny's times hands down! It's probably because all the crew had an average age of 12 and were probably 8 stone wet through. He'd come down to Bath in the van with the crew but him and Jonny were picked up by a helicopter for the return journey. The official video and photos are here.

So we had a lovely day sitting in the sunshine, chatting with some friendly journos and watching lunatics whizz by on sleds (I say 'lunatics' 'cos after the stories I've heard about the track there's no way you'd get me on that thing!). They were so lucky with the weather as it has hammered down all day today.

Jon and I left work early and went to the cinema to see Tom Ford's 'A Single Man' staring Colin Firth, which was brilliant. The attention to period detail was fantastic. Then a take-away Thai meal. All in all a very pleasant day.

*(I found it interesting to watch a video being made and how the 'star' is perceived through the people around him. For example the producer/agent told the scribe from the Chron. that "Mr Evans has refused all interviews, so he won't be speaking to you", although she would be allowed to stand behind the TV crew from the local BBC news when they asked their questions. But when the scribe went up there Chris said, "Do I talk to you first?" only to get a sharp 'NO!' from the producer/agent and get dragged off to see the TV crew. It's easy to see how stories of difficult celebs can get around when they've not actually done anything wrong.)

2010-04-23T11:06:00.001Z

Friday Fun 5

My sister-in-law Claire is back from a successful charity trek in China for Diabetes UK. She's exceeded her fund-raising target, but you can still donate if you haven't already. Just click on the donate link on the left.

Anyway, on to the video. Not as good as Jake Thackery's version, but Mr Carrot does a fine job.

2010-04-22T21:07:00.014Z

Competition time again...

[Sorry, this turned into quite a long post and there may be some swearing and horse nudity]

I've recently returned from this year's major international competition for our sport, this time it was in Kent and I was away for 7 days. The athlete and coaches' accommodation (and therefore mine too) was here. Yes, Mummy and Daddy do spend £25k p.a. to send their little princesses here (and yes, they really are princesses) but the rooms are dorms and youth hostel-like and some of the doors have no locks for fire safety reasons. I bet some of the girls are really rather shocked at the Spartan-ness when they arrive, but once their own duvet covers and posters are in place the rooms look much more homely.

The staff absolutely fell over themselves to make us feel welcome and help the athletes (even to the extent of providing packets of frozen peas when an athlete with a busted shoulder couldn't find any cold gel packs to ease it!). The food was wonderful and was provided in healthy athlete-sized portions - and we're not talking carrot sticks here. Athletes like their food piled high on the plate and after a 3 course meal would wander over to the pannini maker and construct a toasted sandwich on which the poor little machine could barely close. This explains why so many coaches and ex-athletes struggle with their weight once they give up serious competition - and believe me, the sight of some of those huge Eastern European coaches squeezed into a singlet and skimpy shorts first thing in a morning is definitely enough to put you off your breakfast.

This year's competition was a much more relaxed affair than last year, mainly because the venue also went out of their way to do as much for us as possible. This was their first major competition and they really pulled out all the stops on providing staff, funding and printing all the programmes and publicity, finding hundreds of young volunteers at both the venue and the accommodation. I never made it to the venue (oh dear, what a pity, never mind) so the poison dwarf from last year was kept well away from me. And the beauty of going on the train, rather than driving, is that someone always has to come and get you if they need you and by the time they've thought about the time involved in doing that, they've changed their mind and found someone else!

We had a couple of blips before the competition though. One country sent a team over and didn't pay (accommodation and transport costs for one county can come to over £6k, depending on how many athletes and coaches they send and how long they stay). So they were given a deadline to pay by and when the money wasn't transferred they were barred from the competition. The poor athletes were heartbroken, understandable as they'd travelled half way round the world to be there. We then found out that the country's federation was almost bankrupt and had no intention of paying, but we did manage to get the money out of them to cover the 3 nights that the team stayed with us. Another country sent an athlete that they knew wasn't entered into the competition. He came over at his own expense too. We couldn't add him at that late stage but we gave him free board and lodgings for the duration - his federation may have been a bunch of c**ts to do that to him, but we aren't.

It was surprising how many countries said before the event that they couldn't afford to take part. Many athletes pay their own way and you'd be amazed at how many athletes from 'rich' 'first world' nations don't get sponsorship or government funding. OK, given the nature of our sport, they're either sponsored by the military or they have rich parents - for example, one Olympic athlete from an English-speaking first world nation is funded mainly by his parents; to the tune of $30k a year. Perhaps our UK athletes aren't so badly off after all (but then we do bring home Olympic medals).

I found the team from a large Asian nation which hosted the last Olympics smoking in their room: athletes, healthy bunch aren't they!?! Needless to say the fire drill was an unmitigated disaster - after standing outside for 20 mins we could still see athletes in their rooms. The one the next day was better, mainly because we put 'sweepers' on each floor to check the bedrooms and we'd threatened the athletes that we'd do a drill every morning and evening until they got it right!

Because of the hundreds of volunteers and the forward planning we'd done back at the office before we got down to Kent, those of us at the accommodation had a quiet couple of days once the finals started. I got chance to have lunch in the garden a couple of times overlooking the mausoleum and the local golf club. One day I was watching a chap in an invalid carriage trundle across the green when he was suddenly overtaken by his friend's motorised remote controlled bag of golf clubs - a very surreal sight! The grounds are vast and from my lunch-time vantage point I could see various bits of wildlife. Luckily the rabbits had gone by the time the fox arrived. He'd disappear into a daffodil clump and then suddenly his head would pop up to get his bearings and then he'd be off again.

The job also has its surreal side. I was following a couple of cleaners as we walked down a path by one of the accommodation blocks I'd used to house the boys. It was a warm day and, as we turned the corner, the grass on both sides of the path was lined with male athletes in their knickers shaving off their body hair. It doesn't do to take too much notice but, unfortunately, the bodies on show were of the white spindly type rather than bronzed gods, and the undies were more well-washed Aldi than Calvin Kleins. The funny thing was that the cleaners just went ambling on, chatting away as if it was the most natural thing in the world to find the path lined by half-naked men.

My colleague and I got an afternoon off and decided to spend it in Rochester. We started off in the cathedral and it all went down hill from there really when we nearly got thrown out for giggling. If you want to find out why this unicorn is grinning so much, check out the photos here - cos it may be OK to stick this sort of thing up on the wall of a cathedral, but I sure as hell would be reported if I stuck a picture of it up here! How do they get away with it? The crest must be about 5' x 7' and I don't know much about horse anatomy, but those definitely WEREN'T modelled on a horse. The lion on the crest is similar but partly hidden by the way it's standing. I know the term 'lion rampant' is part of heraldry, but I didn't know that's what was meant. Anyway, if you're ever in Rochester, the sculpture in question is on the South Transept aisle above the doorway, basically 'X' marks the spot on this plan. We then went to the castle which gives a good view of the Russian Black Widow submarine that was brought over as a tourist attraction. We followed that with a cream tea and a look round the shops.

Last year's competition, although it was successful and gained us an international award for the best hosted event, did garner some flack; and the source of much of that criticism did make it very hard to deal with, especially for our boss. So much so that the mental and motivational fall-out went on until well after Christmas. But this competition was going so much better and it was great to see everyone enjoying it and the boss getting some positive feedback. You can feel the 'but then...' coming, can't you? Only read on if you've not had your dinner yet, or don't want to eat for a while...

The next day some of the teams were leaving and we had to be around to see them off. It was apparent that one team (from a former Soviet republic) had found the local pub and very dodgy nightclub, as we'd had reports of athletes getting in at around 3 a.m., damaging an art deco table, peeing on a car and spreading food up the stairs. It was a bit worrying as the house was open for tours and the grounds were open for the National Gardens Scheme, so the cleaners had to do some quick work. One of the Scandinavian coaches said as he came down for breakfast past various food items on the landing, "I see some nations have just discovered the potato!". We were also concerned as it was the farewell party that night and we decided to have some volunteers 'patrolling' just to keep an eye on things.

We were hoping it was an isolated incident, but then, as I was going out at lunchtime (12.30) to see some people off, I saw 4 athletes carrying a colleague feet first up the stairs to much giggling. The caretaker thought it was just youthful high spirits, but me and the Estate Manager thought they were drunk and I mentioned this to my colleague. She decided to take a look whilst I was checking athletes onto the airport bus. Halfway up the stairs she encountered 3 lads in shades, clearly drunk and thinking they were untouchable, who pushed past her, followed by their female team mate. My colleague stopped the girl and asked was everything OK, to which the embarrassed girl said that yes, everything was fine. My colleague pushed a bit further and asked was her team-mate drunk? The girl repeated that it was fine and everything was under control, to which my colleague replied that we would have to go and check and the girl ran off. So, we now had house and grounds crawling with the blue-rinse brigade and 3 pissed arrogant male athletes somewhere in the grounds and possibly still drinking. This did not make us feel happy, but luckily (as we found out an hour or so later) they'd actually gone straight back to the venue to watch the competition.

Anyway, once I'd seen the airport bus off, we both went upstairs to investigate. A few minutes of thumping on locked doors brought no response so we got the caretaker to unlock them and found an unconscious male athlete covered in vomit (this isn't the bad bit - that comes later). The room was an absolute state: as well as the vomit, one bed looked like it had been peed on; there was food everywhere trampled into the carpet; there were 6 empty litres of spirits (vodka and scotch) and we later found 3 more full litre bottles, plus cans of larger, as well as about another 2 litres in the girl's room; various things were damaged, including the ceiling; they'd broken the locks on the windows and had got out onto the roof; there was kit they'd stolen from another team as well as items stolen from the school and us, etc, etc, etc.

My colleague has first aid and experience doing stewarding/security work, so has dealt with similar incidents and I left it to her to decide whether he needed medical help. After shaking him about a bit and getting no response she decided to call an ambulance whilst I went to 'phone our boss and get him back from the venue. By the time I'd got back into the room the athlete had thrown up on my colleague too (this still isn't the bad bit). Anyway, the ambulance arrived and the crew started to try to check vital signs etc, at which our athlete friend started to show that maybe he wasn't out completely cold. He started flailing around and being very uncooperative - although his co-ordination was so bad that he managed to hit himself about three times whilst trying to hit out at other people! The ambulance men decided to call for police back-up because we were on the attic level, up some very small winding staircases and they didn't think they could get him out if he was going to get violent.

At this point he started trying to open his trousers: a sure sign that he wasn't as pissed as he'd originally led us to believe because, as the ambulance men pointed out, real drunks don't bother with such niceties. That was the point at which I exited the room and left the ambulance crew to it, 'cos I thought that with his co-ordination, if he decided to pee, it was going to go off like a comedy hose-pipe and one of us covered in his body fluids was already enough!

Unfortunately, he didn't pee... He crapped all over the room instead.

At this point our boss arrived. He was, how should I put this? Shocked? Appalled? Sickened? Luckily, he had his camera with him so we started to keep a very detailed photographic record of the events, the state of the room, the damage, the stolen items in situ, etc. Boss called the venue and demanded that the head coach be brought back along with any team members that could be located. The police also arrived and came very close to arresting the athlete for criminal damage.

When the coach arrived (a very nice, gentle, man with absolutely no control over his athletes) he was as horrified as our boss and actually slapped the lad: we had to stifle our desire to applaud! Eventually they managed to get him into the ambulance and off to hospital with his coach - but only after 2 ambulance crews and 2 police cars had attended. What a complete waste of trained professionals, who could have been out helping people who deserved it, rather than some pissed arrogant idiot who thought he could act how he liked because he was 'special'.

Then the rest of the team appeared: still with shades on, still arrogant and suddenly not able to speak the English that they'd been happily speaking all week. The boss tried to get out of them what had happened but they clammed up, so we decided to take them up to the room. What they saw - and smelled - brought about a miraculous change in their behaviour and I wasn't sure if some of them were going to pass out or throw up, fortunately they did neither. We got them to clear everything out of their rooms and pack. They were at least honest about what was theirs and what was stolen and tried to repair some of the damage.

By then the boss had had enough and he put them on the next airport bus (this was at 5pm and their flight was only at 6.30 the next morning!). But just as the bus was about to go their team-mate and coach turned up from the hospital. He threw up on the bus as soon as he got on it and we were all amazed that the bus driver agreed to take him. The girl turned up later and was put straight into a taxi for the airport.

Lets be completely clear: we're not talking about young athletes on the sporting equivalent of their first school trip to France. These are experienced career athletes, with the man in question having competed at the last Olympics. As the most senior athlete in the squad, who has a wife and child back home, he should have been setting an example to his team-mates, rather than using both ends of his body to spread the contents of this digestive system around one of England's premier private schools.

I'm getting slightly more sociopathic as I get older and I can quite honestly say that I'm not sure I would have stopped him climbing out of the window. To be honest I'm not sure that I could - he was a big lad - but both my colleague and my first reaction was that our boss was having such a good competition, everything was so positive after him having a frankly crap year, and then this pissed tw*t goes and does this. We could have killed him. He was really lucky that the only serious slap he got was from his coach.

We also just keep thinking what could have happened:

- It was pure chance that I happened to see them carrying him up the stairs; what if I'd been called off to do something and by then had forgotten to mention it or follow it up?

- What if we'd not seen the rest of the team coming down without him?

- What if we'd not been nosey and just thought, 'Sod it, it's not our problem'.

- His team-mates locked him into an attic room and left the window open. They'd already broken the bars that were there to stop people climbing out of the window and onto the roof. There was a really tiny parapet - barely a foot high - before a plunge of 3 floors onto the courtyard below. If he'd come-to we'd have been lucky if all he'd decided to do was to rip the door off its hinges. The more probable assumption is that he'd have gone out of the window and pretty rapidly become pavement pizza in front of horrified blue-rinsed on-lookers.

- They'd not left him any water. The only liquid in the room was more alcohol - would he have drunk it and got worse?

- The fact that they left him in that state. Although he did start to come-to after about an hour, when we arrived he couldn't turn himself over, and when he did start to wobble about trying to kneel up we had to keep stopping him hitting his head on the furniture.

Although the situation was bad, it could have been so much worse.

The room had to be professionally cleaned and even then, two days later, the carpet had to be replaced.

Anyway, we submitted a full report with photos to his federation and, to our surprise they have banned him from international competitions for a year, disciplined the entire team and coaches, and insisted that he pay the repair and cleaning costs himself (and we've received the money). We then found out that something had happened involving the same athlete at a competition the month before. So we're wondering whether he was on his final warning, or whether they were just waiting for a complaint accompanied by concrete evidence.

Don't ever let anyone tell you that sport is glamorous!

2010-03-22T16:58:00.005Z

A post about post and a rant

This is the standard of post we've been getting into the office for the last 3 weeks. What gets me is that the Royal Mail can deliver this to her home and training base, but on a daily basis they can't get our properly addressed and stamped post to its destination. Actually, this is quite well addressed in comparison to many as it has a surname on it - many have just had a first name and town.

The organisation that I work for isn't the one that won gold recently, but we our relationship with them is pretty incestuous. The golden girl tried our sport many years ago and is still friends with some of our athletes, whom she invited onto the bus for her 'homecoming'. Jon and I did get invited to the homecoming party and the up-coming black tie do, but it really isn't our sort of thing, and also on the evening of the homecoming party there was a free lecture on the archaeology of the Bronze Age Aegean at the uni - so, no contest really!

But I still can't believe that I'm in a job where I'm coming into contact with such people. How did that happen then? Luckily, as I'm not interested in sport (unless it has an engine attached) I don't recognise them and so treat them quite normally. It's only once they've left the office and I ask my boss who that was that I've just made coffee for and he says, "Phil de Glanville", that I think, "Ooo, I'd have been more impressed had I known!".

Anyway, having said that I'm not interested in sport without engines, I'm now going to have a little rant on its behalf. I've also included at the bottom of the page a post that I wrote on another webpage during the last Olympics.

The entire BOA winter sports budget is £5.8m. We're the 4th richest country on the planet and our winter sports budget is less than the price of a posh house? Let's face it, £5m isn't even a decent lottery win these days and yet the government expects Team GB to go out and win medals in a dozen sports? Some of those sports must only be getting a share of that money that amounts to a hundred thousand pounds, which probably barely covers travel to competitions. And don't start wapping on about how there's a recession on and money could be spent on better things. The current budget will have been set long before we'd all heard of 'sub-prime mortgages'. This budget is a reflection of how poorly sport (outside of cricket, football and rugby) is viewed in Britain and the paucity of our ambitions. It fails to recognise the massive emotional lift to the country that happens when we succeed in something - witness the homecoming parades for various Olympians, as well as those for cup winning rugby and football teams. Our country's sportspeople winning medals makes us feel good about ourselves and counters the over-riding negativity that seems to be a British characteristic and comes out of our printed media on a daily basis. Success in sport also has measurable benefits to industry and the economy; from increased motivation and productivity of workers to the FTSE rising, so it's arguable that investment in sport sees returns in the country generally.

You'd be amazed at how much grass-roots work the sports do with, frankly, pathetic budgets. These sports go into schools and work with youth clubs all over the country. In some inner cities the kids' horizons may be limited to the few blocks of their local neighbourhood, but through the input of sporting bodies they can find that an activity they enjoy like riding a bike, swimming, sliding down a snowy hill on a home-made sled, could actually take them somewhere in life. What benefits does greater investment in sport have for society in general? With kids doing something other than getting into gangs and knifing each other? Or kids adopting a healthier lifestyle and not becoming a drain on the NHS through obesity?

Not funding sport properly snatches opportunity away from children. It's also a kick in the teeth to the hundreds and thousands of ordinary people who go out there week after week and volunteer to give up their time for free to support something they love. These range from all those marshalls without whom motorsport, from the lowest Saturday afternoon hillclimb to an F1 race, could not function. British marshalls are the best in the world and they risk their lives for free every weekend ensuring that races can happen safely. But also, when you watch a large athletics event, all those red-jacketed judges and officials around the track are volunteers. When we held the World Champs last year people from all over Britain used a week or a fortnight's annual leave to come and work like slaves from the early hours of the morning to late at night (actually many worked into the early hours of the next morning), without pay, to ensure a successful event. OK, we pay their travel expenses and give them accommodation and food, but we're taking hostels not the Ritz.

Doubling the money we put into sports, especially winter sports, would still barely register as a blip on Britain's economic radar but the benefits it would reap are out of all proportion with the investment. That's also why I see London winning the Olympics as a wholly good thing, no matter what it costs. If we put on a good show it will make us all feel better. And even if we don't win every medal going, we'll still be raking in the money from all those tourists and teams who'll be coming over. I do wish we could stop being a country of miserable b*stards and see the bigger picture!

****************************
Summer 2008

"I've just been pondering what Gareth Southgate (?, well, someone on Football Focus anyway) said at the weekend regarding the dodgy result mid-week, that England seemed out of love with its footballers and its footballers seemed out of love with England.

I think this week the sport-watching public found the contrast was just too great between a bunch of 'pampered, preening pillocks' (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/leagues/premierleague/manutd/2305486/Sepp-Blatter-is-this-really-slavery.html ) who are over-paid and constantly under achieve and our Olympic athletes who are just the opposite.

OK, I know that at the higher echelons of athletics, etc, athletes have fantastic sponsorship deals and are on very good earnings. But at the bottom, in those sports we've never heard of before this week (kayaking, BMX, etc), competitors fit their training in around daily life because the grant cheque from the sport funding body won't pay all the bills. They're getting up at ungodly hours to train before school and work and can expect to do the same in the evening. Often the grant cheque is late, putting mortgages/rent at risk.

I know our footballers may not deserve, as Southgate says, to be booed as they walk on, booed as they play and booed as they walk off, but fans are justifiably frustrated.

After the Olympics there will be 'inquests' into underperforming sports like judo and certain athletic events. Funding will be withdrawn and people will lose their jobs because they've failed to reach the targets they've set themselves in negotiation with the funding bodies. But let's not forget that entire sports are run in the UK on less than a single Premiership footballer's annual salary, often on less than their monthly wage. From this each sport's governing body must pay coaches and athletes, travel to world-class competitions, pay for kit, put on competitions, have some admin back up, etc, etc. For those sports to actually get one athlete to the Olympics can be seen as a major achievement, but to then win a medal...

If Premiership footballers showed the same sort of dedication and responsibility that our Olympic sportsmen/women have shown, I think they'd be on their way to winning back some of the respect they've lost over recent years. And, who knows, they may start winning on the pitch too."

2010-02-12T20:42:00.001Z

Friday Fun 4

Some things in life are bad
They can really make you mad
Other things just make you swear and curse.
When you're chewing on life's gristle
Don't grumble, give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best...

Worse things happen at sea you know...

2010-01-20T08:28:00.002Z

Snow day 2

I had another snow day last Wednesday. Too much snow to get the car out, so we walked to the station through the park. When we got there Jon 'phoned his boss who said, "The roads haven't been gritted and are lethal, oh and I haven't seen any buses". Not a problem for himself, who works on the flat within walking distance of the station; bit more of a problem for me who works about 4 miles from the station up hill that has a 10% gradient for several of those miles. So Jon checked the internet and, indeed, the buses had all been cancelled.

So I walked home along the cycle path. There are pictures in the 'snow' photo album on the right, all taken with my 'phone so they're not brilliant, but much better than I expected.

I was in a crafty mood so I made a new peg bag from a couple of old pillows (Next circa 1990), so at least the day at home wasn't wasted! The matching duvet cover is being sewn onto the back of this quilted throw that I got as a free gift with something several years ago. The front is pretty enough, but it's quite thin and is backed with a really nasty cheap lining fabric, so it's getting blue and white striped cotton instead.

Unfortunately, I don't have a sewing machine, so I reckon that following each of the quilting lines by hand will probably take about 3 months! Still, it'll keep me warm on the sofa over the winter.

One week on and it's snowing here again as I type this - I don't know what the weather has against Wednesdays. I've made it into work this week, but will I make it home?

2010-01-15T12:56:00.000Z

Friday Fun 3

I thought all nuns left the seat up...

2010-01-08T13:38:00.006Z

New Decade, New Dreams

A forum I belong to started a thread recently on the start of the new decade and reflections on the past ten years. I'd forgotten that ten years ago we were all relieved to find that the Millennium Bug hadn't brought the world to an end. We all started posting on our past 10 years and hopes for the future; here's mine...

10 years ago we were just coming to the end of the house move from hell. We had a bet on with some friends, who were also having problems with the house they wanted to buy, as to who would move in first. We lost as it only took us 7 months to move, whilst it took them almost a year! The final straw for us was our buyer dropping out on the day of exchange just before Christmas ‘99, we looked around our house stacked with boxes ready to move and just couldn’t face staying there, so we went into Bath and spent the night at a hotel. That turned out to be a bit of a disaster too and when I was telling my counsellor the following week of all the awful things that had happened, he said, “Do you think you’re getting a bit paranoid?”. I think he was a bit taken aback when I shouted, “Paranoid? Paranoid? Of course I’m f****** paranoid! I’ve got every reason to be f******-well paranoid!”. I’m a firm believer in the old saying that, ‘just because you’re paranoid, it doesn’t mean they’re not out to get you’.

Anyway, luckily the vendors were buying a brand new Barratt home and Barratt bought our house to stop their sale falling through (for a tiny bit more than our buyer had offered, plus it was a private sale so no estate agent’s fees). We moved in Feb ’00 and we’re still in the house and have no intentions of moving (well, unless our numbers come up and the house of our dreams comes on the market at the same time).

Jon had just started a new job and was very happy. His old job had been a bit rough towards the end and also had him working late 2 nights a week and alternate Saturdays. The new job was 8.30 to 5 and no weekends, so a significant improvement, although a slight drop in salary. He’s still there, despite being out-sourced and the company changing hands several times.

I was less happy with my job. That’s probably an understatement. But I did manage to negotiate a couple of periods of going part-time, which probably helped me hang on to what little sanity I had left. One period was where I moved sideways into a project role for 18 months working 2.5 days a week – that was an eye-opener: people actually said, ‘Thank you’, ‘That was really good work’, ‘You’ve really helped us a great deal there’, etc – it’s amazing what a morale boost someone just saying ‘thank you’ is. It also made me realise that so much of my normal job entailed banging my head against a brick wall, it was nice to do a job and not have people putting barriers in your way. The other 2.5 days a week were spent teaching Adult Literacy, researching some local history for a small family company, yoga lessons, volunteering at my local museum and starting to do an A Level in Art History which finally led to me getting a First in an OU degree in Dec 2006.

When the project finished and I had to go back to my old full-time job I decided to swap jobs with a colleague on a different campus, in the hope that I would feel better. But the organisation made half of all the library staff redundant, so that made things worse rather than better! I managed to negotiate another period of ‘part-time’ work, where I took Mondays off in return for working an evening, short lunch breaks and getting a bit less pay. When this was coming to an end in Jan ’08 the organisation started another round of redundancies. I applied for redundancy and got it. Started a new job in July ‘08, outside my interests and skills, and am thoroughly enjoying it.

We did a charity motorbike ride in India in Oct ’06. This was my idea, decided on the basis that I spend the majority of my life frightened of, well, just life really, that I might as well do something genuinely scary now an again ‘cos it’s not going to make me feel any worse and, hopefully, the wonderful experiences I come back with should actually make me feel a lot better. We raised £2,000 and had a brilliant time. Unfortunately, it also cost us around £2k each to do it, so it did contribute towards my minor debt problem that finally got cleared in July ’08 (it was worth every penny). Oh and, on the subject of charity treks, have you sponsored my sister-in-law yet? Click on the Just Giving link on the right to read about her trek and donate to Diabetes UK.

Jon's brother got married to Helen (and provided us with a nice photo to go on the top of our blog!) and we got a gorgeous little nephew in Dec ’06.

After 19 years of road-testing, we got married in April 2007 on my 40th birthday. That was something the pair of us, let alone all our friends and relatives, never thought we’d see.

BUT we’ve seen colleagues and people we admired be struck down at such stupidly young ages with debilitating illnesses which have led, in some cases, to an early death and in others to permanent incapacity. Sadly we’ve also lost 3 grand-mothers in the last 12 months and the last remaining one isn’t too well either. So, I suppose that what we'd like to do in the future is to find a balance between working and enjoying ourselves (the latter does need work as, by nature, we’re both miserable gits!).

The decision not to over-extend ourselves when we bought our new house has proved very useful, as we are slowly being able to afford to do more enjoyable things that were previously out of reach. I hope that the emotional problems have settled down and that we can enjoy the next ten years, rather than just existing, as much of the previous 20 seem to have been.

So goals for the next 10 years:

1. pay off mortgage in 2012 (13 years early)
2. travel more – possibly by volunteering on archaeological/environmental projects
3. perhaps do more studying
4. work less
5. enjoy life more
6. do more draft/scary things to prove I’m still alive
7. use the motorbikes more – preferably abroad, preferably Libya, Iceland and Morocco

Goals for 2010:

1. re-mortgage in Feb when our 10 year fixed rate ends
2. over-pay mortgage to allow us to pay it off early
3. do at least one long motorbike holiday this year, even if it does rain all summer, again
4. get more exercise

Happy New Year!

2010-01-06T14:22:00.015Z

Yay, snow day!

We've wimped out of going into work today.

Actually, Jon is working from home and so is plugged into the main PC whilst I use the Eeepc on the sofa. The uni where my office is based is closed; it's at the top of a hill and when I talked to my colleague earlier, she said someone she'd spoken to at the uni told her that people weren't able to get up the hill in their cars.

It's only put about 2 inches down here so far, but we're quite sheltered and I think it's worse on more exposed local roads. It's been snowing steadily for most of the day so it may get deeper - let's hope, egh?

Still, it's given me a chance to take the Xmas decs down and do some tidying. The ironing is next.

I've also made a seed cake for the birds and put it out along with the remains of the tarte tatin I made for Christmas Day. The tarte seems to have gone down very well with Mr Blackbird, actually I appear to be responsible for creating a feathered monster who's smacked off his tits on sugar and is aggressively defending his slice of pie from all comers. He's already seen off a thrush and a jay and is back for his third piece that's the size of his head. Mrs Blackbird is round the front of the house delicately picking all the berries from our pyracantha.

I promised pictures of my chilli fairy lights and here they are with my favourite tree decoration, the drag queen poodle.

Oh, and whilst I'm trying to put off doing the ironing, here are photos of the new chair and sofa.

2009-12-30T12:06:00.007Z

Steaming

Jon's sister Claire, Jon and I took our little nephew Archie (3) to see Father Christmas on the steam railway at Bitton last week. Although it's a close run thing as to who was most excited about it, Archie or his aunties!

Father Christmas played a blinder by giving Archie his most favourite thing in the world, no, not the biscuit the size of his head, but a set of cars. More photos over in the photo album on the right.

We handed Archie back to his Dad stuffed with biscuits and over-stimulated to the point of hysteria - well, what are aunties and uncles for anyway? We're hoping that Archie might take us on the train next year too, erm, I mean we might take him...

We had our usual nice quiet Christmas Day, just the two of us and a chicken, and were joined on Boxing Day by the outlaws and Claire. After a quick walk round the stones at Avebury we tucked into the left-overs, the ham and Claire's lovely chestnut stuffing and Marianne's great bubble and squeak.

The outlaws are now cruising round the Caribbean despite the best efforts of BA to stop them. Bet it's not pissing-down there...

2009-12-11T08:45:00.002Z

Friday Fun 2

Strangely enough, remembering "Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle" did not help me when I was in the exam at the end of my OU philosophy course.

American beer, it's like making love in a canoe*...

* That's a bit rich coming from the "Aussies"

2009-12-06T18:25:00.004Z

Chillies

I'm completely knackered after partaking of a cooking marathon this afternoon. It seemed like a good idea at the time, but I think I've over-done it. We've now got enough tomato and pepper soup to float a small navy, there's a lamb tagine cooling in the oven, a chicken rogan josh marinating in the 'fridge alongside tomorrow night's dinner of stuffed peppers. Oh well, the tomatoes were going manky, so I did need to use them up, ditto the peppers and it's been a few weeks since I had a curry and I'm beginning to get withdrawal symptoms.

The idea was to freeze a lot of this (all the soup, the tagine and half the rogan josh) but I've just discovered that there's no room in the freezer 'cos it's taken up by the gammon joint I bought to cook for Boxing Day (a Gordon Ramsey [ugh, spit] recipe that ends up with it being baked in treacle - God it's tasty). Bugger. Some major re-arranging is going to have to be done once I can stand up again.

Anyway, chillies. Someone asked how I dry chillies, so I'm posting the answer here for future reference.

Method 1 - just freeze them instead

Method 2 - thread (or tie) them by the stalks onto a length of cotton and hang in a warm place - airing cupboard, above the cooker vent at the back of the hob, or just dangling prettily in the kitchen somewhere.

Method 3 - spread them on a baking tray and pop them into the oven every time you finish cooking and have turned the heat off. I've got a double oven, so I just leave them in the top oven/grill and the heat from the main oven below dries them out over a few weeks.

Method 4 - put them in the oven on the lowest light possible and keep a very careful eye on them. I'd say this is the most risky.

You can then either leave them whole and just use as normal, or put them through a blender and use them as crushed chillies - but be very careful not to breathe in the fine dust as you decant them into a jar.

Now, if you're really lucky, I'll post a picture of my new fairy lights that are shaped like chilli peppers - once we've put the Xmas tree up.

2009-12-04T12:38:00.004Z

Friday fun

After dealing with a doctor's receptionist who was particularly stupid (doctor's receptionists will be first up against the wall when the revolution comes, I promise you), I need something amusing.

This should get the weekend off to a good start. Ignore the video and just listen to comic genius Jake Thackery at his best.

This song...is dirty...

2009-11-28T15:16:00.001Z

Just back from the funeral of our third Granny in less than a year - so we're down to just one Granny between us now. My Gran Mason died peacefully in her sleep just over a week ago and this is the last photo that was taken of her when my Dad visited her just a couple of days before she died. At 90 she was the youngest of the Grannies.

So, no more will either of my Grannies look past me when I walk in to see them and say, "Isn't Jon with you?" (or, when speech was becoming difficult with Gran, just a straining to see round me and a quavering, "Jon?"), if he was a little slow at coming through the door! At the end of the funeral service the Minister said, "And our thoughts go with Alan, Jean (my Dad and Mum), Jon and Beverley...", and I thought, "I reckon both Gran and Nanna would have been happy with that!"

One story sticks in my mind. After my Dad was born Gran's next pregnancy was with twins who, were still born. As she put it, in those days dead babies were just taken away and 'disposed of' so she never got to see them and say goodbye. Not everything was better in the good old days.

2009-11-13T13:23:00.012Z

Redundancy – 16 months on

I just thought I'd post a quick catch up on life not quite 18 months after redundancy.

Right, let's just start with a bit of history; 'cos you might say, “Oh, it's OK for her. She got redundancy and then got a new job straight away - I bet she's not strapped for cash.” Well, it was the changes I made in my spending and saving habits in the 18 months before redundancy that allowed me to take it when it was offered.

I think that in January 2007, soon after the trip to India, I had a car loan, the costs of the India trip on the credit card and an overdraft, so about £5,000 in total. OK, so £5K isn't a huge debt, but it wasn’t getting any less and was enough to worry me and for me to think that something had to change.

The idea was to have everything paid off by June 2008 when the loan ended, but it wasn’t easy. I’ve always thought, “We’ve got good jobs, we’re not extravagant, we don’t take expensive holidays, but we never have any money. Where does it all go? We can’t spend less than we already do.” I’d kept a spending diary for most of my adult life, so I knew exactly where the money was going, but that’s very different from knowing whether I actually needed to spend that money. What was needed was a change in attitude to our finances.

If anyone is foolhardy enough to ask, I can detail exactly where and how we made savings, but broadly, my main areas of savings were in: groceries, which covers food, cleaning/laundry stuff, basic shared toiletries and beer for a Saturday night (cut from around £300-£350 per month for 2 of us down to £200 – finding out that someone I know only spends £250 a month to feed a family of 7 was a shock!); petrol – I car shared a couple of days a week; shopping around more and using cashback sites for things like insurance. But just keeping an eye on everyday spends and using a financial message board to set targets worked wonders. I also tried things like using cash only for a couple of months and, whilst that didn’t really work well enough to continue long-term, it still gave me more of a sense of how I was using money and made me change some habits.

As I said, we’re not extravagant: I don’t spend loads of money on clothes, our annual holiday cost less than £600 between us, we’re not gadget-freaks and have usually had second-hand TVs, sometimes black and white. So that meant that it was just casual over-spending on daily living, so I looked at everything we spent: the newsagent’s bill, the groceries, weekends with friends, insurance, toiletries, charities, subscriptions, etc, etc and saved ourselves over £4,000 a year. We still don’t do ‘extreme LBYM’ (living below your means), for example, I still use the butcher and use small shops as much as possible, but that means that there’s further reductions we can make if we need to. To be honest we've barely noticed any change in our living standards. I can now bore for Britain on budgeting, personal finance and investments – be warned, if you say, “I don’t know where all my money goes” you may notice the Ancient Mariner-like glitter that comes into my eye and you should run away very quickly!

The plan to have everything paid off by June 2008 was achieved and it coincided with redundancy being offered at work. As we believed that being miserable in my job (actually, ‘suicidal’ in my job would be closer to the mark) was a key issue in my overspending – especially on food - we decided that going for the redundancy would actually be a sensible option. Working the figures out, it seemed that even if I couldn’t find another job straight away, with the debts paid and my new spending regime in place, I could survive on the redundancy money for almost a year – even though it represented less than half my actual annual take-home pay.

So I applied (read ‘begged’) for redundancy and got it. I also applied for a job in an area I’ve got no interest or experience in (sports administration) and got that too! So my new job started the day after my old one finished. The gross pay was £7k p.a. less than my old job, but we worked out that actually monthly it was about the same as I had been living on for the previous 18 months once the debt repayments had gone out, so actually I was going to be no worse off each month.

So, how have the last 16 months been? Well, I love my new job. I have much less responsibility, I deal with far fewer ‘customers’ each day and my colleagues and the majority of the customers are lovely. I’m doing sensible things like getting out of the office at lunchtime for a walk and I’ve got a much better perspective on what is important and what isn’t. I’ve got to say that when my boss is having to write a report, give a presentation, or deal with fractious staff (ooo, that’d be me then!) I just think, “There but for the grace of God…” and thank my lucky stars that I’m well out of it. Most days I walk away at 5pm and think nothing more about work until 8.30 the next morning, but I have volunteered to work some weekends at competitions and also spent 10 days in London over the summer working 14 hour days at a major world sporting competition. I’m still a miserable git (you can’t change everything) but at least I’m no longer a depressed miserable git – saved quite a bit on the cost of therapy too!

We now work in the same city and can car-share every day, which has saved us around £150 more per month. Jon has also sold his car, saving him money on servicing, etc, and meaning that he also now contributes to my annual car costs.

The redundancy money was squirreled away into my ISAs and I’ve actually doubled it in the last year and a bit, so I now have 1 year’s take-home pay saved up. The next goal is paying off the mortgage early: five years early is easy, ten years early is a distinct possibility.

What still rankles is that if I'd had my 'light-bulb' moment 2 years, 5 years or 7 years earlier I'd have been able to walk away from a job that I hated a long time before I did. And my mental health and quality of life would have been a lot better. But, hey, that's water under the bridge and at least I made a change before it got worse.

2009-10-17T21:07:00.006Z

From Tunisia Sept 09

This year we're off to sunny...

Tunisia actually and as you can see it wasn't! But we still got out to lots of 'sites': Punic and Roman Carthage; Tunis and the Bardo museum; the Ribat at Sousse; the medina, a mausoleum and a mosque in Kairouan; and the amazing museum and Roman amphitheatre at El Djem.

The museum at El Djem had an excavated Roman villa in it and a partly excavated Roman town - really stunning. They have so many fantastic mosaics that all the museums we went to had them set in the floor for you to walk on, or have them in situ out in the open in the villa or town for you to stroll on - things that are so rare over here in the UK that they're treated like fragile fabrics; protected behind glass.

Tunisia was great, much less hassle than in Egypt and a lot cheaper too.

Anyway, now we're back we can enjoy our new sofa and chair. Lise will remember our old sofa 'cos when she moved into her first house they bought a grey and white striped sofa from Habitat. When we moved into our first house a about a year later (May 1990) we bought the peach and white striped sofa-bed version. I gave it a new seat pad and re-covered it in a Laura Ashley yellow and orange check when we moved to the new house in 2000, but it's now come to the end of its life and has been replaced by something rather Edwardian looking with large maroon chenille flowers on a dark grey background. We've also replaced the wooden framed chair that I 'bought' as one of a pair from the chap I used to work for in a newsagent's when I was a teenager: I say 'bought' 'cos all he wanted was a £10 donation to charity and I had to store them at Nanna's for several years before I had a house to put them in. The new chair is a sober cream with beige and brown stripes.

Last year Jon replaced the large heavy old armchair (which must have been about 50 years old) his Gran and Grandad had given us when they were replacing their suite 15 years ago with a very nice leather armchair from Laura Ashley. So the living room now looks rather elegant, although I'm not sure that the furniture quite matches the walls and curtains, but I don't think I can be bothered doing anything about it!

Now to start saving up to have the boiler replaced, but I don't think that will be quite so much fun as choosing furniture!

Oh, and, have you sponsored Claire yet? Click on the 'donate' link on the right to read about her up-coming trek. She's done so well at controlling her diabetes through diet that the doc has taken her off the insulin for a trial period - how good is that?! We're off on a training walk with her tomorrow, so fingers crossed that the weather will stay fine.

2009-10-17T19:40:00.002Z

Hey, my butcher's on YouTube!

2009-09-28T21:26:00.002Z

Lists

All blogs seem to have to have a list on them somewhere, so here's a list of books I've read in the last 12 months:

1. E H Gombrich "A Little History of the World"
2. J K Galbriath "The Great Crash: 1929"
3. Dorothy Hartley "Food in England" (re-read)
4. Roy Lewis "Evolution Man"
5. P J O'Rourke "Republican Party Reptile"
6. Agatha Christie "Death on the Nile" (re-read whilst cruising down the Nile)
7. Mark Twain "Innocents Abroad"
8. Terry Pratchett "Witches Abroad" (re-read)
9. J K Galbriath "The Affluent Society"
10.Terry Pratchett "Monstrous Regiment"
11.Harriet O'Brien "Queen Emma and the Vikings"
12.Bryan Magee "Clouds of Glory"
13.Terry Pratchett "Reaper Man"
14.Oliver James "The Selfish Capitalist"
15.Nigel Barley "Not a Hazardous Sport"
16.John O'Farrell "An Utterly Impartial History of Britain"
17.Terry Pratchett "Equal Rites"
18.Ben Goldacre "Bad Science"
19.Mark Twain "A Tramp Abroad"
20.Phil Thornton "Casuals" (re-read)
21.Terry Pratchett "Thud"
22.Bill Naughton "On the Pig's Back"
23.Colin MacInnes "Absolute Beginners"
24.Jack Rosenthal "By Jack Rosenthal"
25.Elizabeth von Arnim "Elizabeth and her German Garden"
26."The Best of Granta Travel [Writing]" re-read

Only 5 Pratchetts? Oh dear, must do better in the next 12 months!

2009-09-07T21:46:00.013Z

Claire's Charity Trek

Please have a look at my sister-in-law Claire's blog and Just Giving page, which are both linked to over on the right =>

Claire was diagnosed with Type-2 diabetes almost a year ago and has done brilliantly well in sticking to a balanced diet and doing exercise to help control it, so much so that the number of daily insulin pills she needs to take has been halved. She's now decided to do a trek along the Great Wall of China to raise money for Diabetes UK, as their help and information has been invaluable to her since her diagnosis.

As with our trek (grief, was that really 3 years ago?!), Claire is paying her own way, so all the money she raises will go directly to the charity. If you do decide to donate, please choose the 'Gift Aid' option 'cos it will enable the charity to reclaim tax on your donation - this makes your donation worth an extra 25%.

So, good luck Claire - I'm sure it will be a fabulous (if foot-sore) experience!

2009-09-03T21:12:00.011Z

This Sporting Life...

I've been away for 10 days...to Croydon. Not a holiday, you understand, but work. Thankfully, I didn't see a lot of Croydon but, from what I did see, the detenation of a thermo-nuclear device in the town centre could only improve it.

My employer was hosting an international event at a near-by world famous sporting venue and I was up there for 10 days in a hotel, all meals paid for, and in return I worked 14 hour days dealing with grumpy athletes. Simples...

Let me stress that the area around this sporting venue (and Croydon in general) is rough and the fun started the night before I arrived when the local yoofs set fire to the bedding and feed we'd got in for the horses. The fire brigade arrived within 6 minutes, but found that every fire hydrant on the site had been decommissioned and they had to run hoses from the road a quarter of a mile away. Took the them over an hour to put it out 'cos straw/hay bales can still be burning inside and they had to keep checking it with thermo-camera-thingies. The little gits stood in the tree line watching the fun. Luckily, no horses or staff had arrived at that point, so it was just an expensive lesson learned and we had 4 days to get better security, improve the fencing and buy in more hay. But the little buggers did try it again later in the week.

This fire hydrant SNAFU was ironic considering the attitude of the local council's health and safety nazis. They had insisted on a total road closure around the venue during the final two days of the competition, with cars escorted at walking pace by a man with a flag. Er...'hello', this is 2009 not 1889. You couldn't make it up, could you? They did eventually ditch the flag idea, but the man walking with the car remained. I must stress that the staff at the centre couldn't have been more helpful or nice, they really did go out of their way for us. But the local council of an extremely deprived area should, I thought, be doing more to bring in events rather than doing their best to put people off. But what do I know...

As I say, nice area, Croydon. There was a stabbing across from my hotel on the second day I was there. I looked out of my bedroom window to see 4 squad cars, a paramedic and an ambulance. Two of the police cars soon went, followed by the paramedic and (empty) ambulance, to be replaced by the scenes of crime lady with her camera and sample-taking box. Very exciting, very 'Taggart'...

My initial job was to meet the athletes and coaches as they arrived and deal with their accommodation and other accreditation formalities. Whilst all the countries were supposed to pay in advance, very few did, so me and our finance administrator ended up dealing with rather a lot of money. Some of this spent a short time in our waist packs and our favourite joke was, "Does this 60,000 euros make my bum look big?!" (well, you think of something funnier after working a 14 hour day!).

Many people I met were lovely. Some weren't. The president of our world governing body (thank Christ he isn't a Brit) come up to my colleague to complain about his swing tag. All the swing tags had on them was first- and surname and country, but this wasn't good enough: "When I go to an event everyone needs to know who I am: so my pass must have my job title on it, also my professional title and, as the governing body is neutral, my nationality must be removed". Not said quite so nicely as that though, leaving my colleague open-mouthed. I thought that a perma-tanned short-arse going round at the centre of a posse of butt-kissers would be fairly easy to spot as El Presidente, but obviously not. Strangely enough my boss over-ruled my suggestion that El Presidente's pass be changed to say, "Self-obsessed auto-eroticist with his head so far up his own backside that he can't see out". It probably wouldn't have fitted on anyway. But perhaps if you're the international head of a sport no-one has ever heard of, you have to do things like that to bolster your ego. Personally, I think it was just a hefty dose of 'short man syndrome'.

Everyone, from the CEO down to the local kids we had as volunteer runners (not to mention many of our own members who were using their annual leave to spend 1 or 2 weeks working unpaid behind the scenes) worked themselves into the ground to make the competition work; and many coaches and athletes told us how much they'd enjoyed the competition and how well-run it was - which made the late nights and the idiots a bit easier to bear!

Anyway, it was fascinating to see a sporting event from the inside and I had some experiences that I never expected to have: like running round a hotel at 11 at night with an arm full of guns, trying to re-patriate them to their owners before they flew out the following morning. I found it so wierd to be in corporate uniform for a week, it makes you anonymous but priviledged at the same time, but it was such a relief to get back into normal clothes again!

2009-06-25T19:27:00.012Z

More birthdays and holidays

You know, I think it will take me a very long time to lose the thrill of going for holidays during 'term-time'. Not only are they cheaper, but there are less people around and the weather is generally better - 'cos, as we all know, it rains as soon as the school holidays start.

The latest vacation was a week in the Elan Valley in Wales, during the first week of June, with all Jon's family to celebrate his Mum's round-number birthday. So, that's 7 adults and one two-and-a-half year old in 2 cottages in the middle of nowhere - some of the participants (Neil and Helen) couldn't even find the cottages and we had to send out a search party (Claire) to meet them and escort them in! (And even then they didn't believe where they were being led and thought Claire had taken the wrong road!)

The cottages were great and very eco-friendly (of course, the Centre for Alternative Technology isn't that far away), with rain water used to flush the loos, solar panels to heat the water for showering and a wind turbine for electricity. If it had only had a reed-bed sewerage system as well I don't think I'd have ever come home! The owners had a small-holding so there were sheep, ducks and chickens wandering round. Archie loved feeding the fowl and no, it isn't my fault that by the end of the week he was running round shouting, "Cock! Cock! Cock!".

The Elan Valley is gorgous. There's lots of places to walk and some excellent paths and bridleways, the Elan Valley Way and the Wye Valley Way are very well marked. Brilliant biking roads and there were lots of lovely motorbikes to gawp at, especially at the weekend. The valley is a series of reservoirs that were built in the late 19th/early 20th century to provide water for Birmingham; completely flooding the valley and displacing the residents. The dams are very impressive. There was a smaller reservoir, the Nant-y-Gro, which provided water for the workers' village whilst the other dams were being constructed. But, in 1942, Barnes Wallis was allowed to blow it up as part of his experiments to perfect the explosive depth charge that would be used a year later in the bouncing bombs that destroyed the Mohne and Eder dams. The surviving bits of the Nant-y-Gro dam can still be seen at each side of a small burn that trickles into the Cader Coch reservoir. There are lots of pictures in our photo album over on the right.

The nearest town was Rhayader which had two good butchers and various other shops and we had two very good meals at the Elan Hotel - we're very tempted to go back with the bikes and stay there.

Jon and I walked the 6 miles over to the Red Kite Centre at Gigrin Farm and met the rest of our party there one day. It was an amazing experience watching these enormous birds (6 foot wingspan) and getting really rather close to them. The farm owners put meat out once a day and dozens of birds appeared, in fact we could see them waiting on the hillside and in the trees just behind the farm! As well as Kites there were Buzzards and Crows joining in the fun - in the winter there can be up to 500 birds coming to each feeding session and some have even come down from Scotland (they can tell by the rings put on their legs).

We also visited Devil's Bridge and the ruined Cistercian abbey of Strata Florida. Oh, and sat around and read lots too. The weather was glorious and the owner said she's lived there since 1974 and she thought it must be some sort of record: a week without rain!

2009-06-24T12:46:00.007Z

And today's 'Bug of the Day' is...

The Horntail or Wood Wasp - Urocerus gigas - which is about 6cm long (in my book that's BIG for a bug) and it doesn't half make a racket as it flies past your lughole with those great big double wings!

It's got black and yellow stripes and looks like it's got a stingy thing at the back, so it appears quite scary. But the pointy thing at the back is only to drill into conifers with, so it doesn't sting and is harmless - but still surprising when you're sat out at lunchtime tucking into your tuna sarnie (especially when you have to wait til you get back to the office to find out what it was!).

And the invention of the day is...

Brouge roller skates - ideal for the pinstriped man about town who needs to get to meetings quickly. Now just to sell my idea to Nike and retire to Monaco with my millions...

2009-05-22T12:52:00.011Z

Exercise and bugs

I've started an 'exercise regime'...

Well, I've started walking UP the stairs at work as well as down them! But, to be fair, I do work on the 9th floor. My potential maximum 'ups' and 'downs' is 4 of each per day and I'm managing at least 3 most days. I do have to stop on the 6th floor to 'look at the view'/'get my keys out'/'pretend I'm waiting for someone'/etc when the real reason is to ensure that I'm not wheezing like a ruptured bagpipe by the time I get back to the office!

I've not died yet, but I'm not sure whether my eyes are supposed to be crossed like that, or feel like there's an elephant sat on my chest, by the time I get back to my desk.

The views are worth it though, I can see two of Wiltshire's White Horses from the stairwell (from Cherhill near Calne over on the extreme left to Westbury over on the right), although I'm less impressed by what looks suspiciously like a dead cockroach in the unbrushed bit of the stairs...

A slighty more interesting beetle was in the loading bay at the bottom of the stairs. I'd not seen one before so I thought it was a foreign import that had come in on a pallet, but then I spotted it in a magazine - the cockchafer beetle, mine was specifically the garden chafer variety. The general chorus when I pointed it out to colleagues was, 'I bet it does!', as it's about an inch long and has seemingly spikey legs, but it's a vegetarian. It's more commonly called the May bug and only lives for a few weeks in April and May. So, there you are, exercise AND education! I'm off for a lie down...

2009-05-07T11:26:00.007Z

Stories

At the start of December we still had a full set of Grannies, which seems quite unusual for people in their 40s. Their ages ranged from almost 90 to almost 102. But just before Christmas Jon's maternal Gran died and in early April my maternal Nanna also passed away - strange to think that our Mothers are now both orphans! By any standards Nanna had a 'good death' and, at a month short of her 102nd birthday and with all her faculties and in general good health (apart from her knees), she's certainly had 'a good innings'. On Thursday she was a bit sulky 'cos her special friend, Agnes, had gone into hospital for a few days whilst her diabetes was stabilized. On Friday she decided to stay in bed and receive her visitors and staff in regal state in her room - chatting to the Matron when she popped in, asking after her family and saying 'Have a good weekend and I'll see you on Monday'. On Saturday and Sunday she slept almost constantly and on Sunday evening the weekend Matron said that she didn't think Nanna would last the night. She didn't and died at 12.10 Monday morning. Strangely, Agnes also died within 24 hours.

As a child I loved listening to stories about my grandparents' and great grandparents' (yes, I can remember 4 of my great grandparents too!) lives and the passing of both of these two women, whom I adored, made me think of the stories that died with them and with the people who've gone before.

Nanna's father was still alive and living with her when I was born and Nanna used to mind me whilst my parents were at work. Apparently, 'Big Grandad' and I got on very well and I can still remember the large (he really was huge, especially to a small child) dark presence with a watch-chain constantly in his waistcoat. He died in his late 90s in 1971, in the same hospital that was treating me for the TB he'd given me and which killed him. We have photos of him as a young man playing football and family legend has it that he played for Newcastle and had a trial for Swindon Town, but decided to stay in Wigan. His father worked for the local aristocracy (yes, there was such a thing in Wigan...) also who had land in Scotland and there he picked up annecdotes about Robbie Burns - my Grandad learned them off his father-in-law and use to tell me them, but he's dead and I can't remember them.

Other stories concerned family tragedies: Big Grandad's beloved younger sister, alone in the house after school, reached up to the mantle shelf for something that she'd been told not to touch and her dress caught fire. Big Grandad was walking home across the field behind the house as she came running out with her dress ablaze. Nanna's own sister ('the favourite and very spoilt' according to Nanna - well, I said I adored her, I didn't say she was objective!) ran off with a GI during the war, leaving behind a husband and 3 young children, never to be heard of again. Nanna's mother literally 'dropped dead' after an evening at the cinema when she was a child and, with two young children to bring up, Big Grandad remarried. Nanna didn't talk much of her stepmother, but I got the impression that there was no love lost there. Nanna was apprenticed to a seamstress in her early teens and said she had to listen to her friends playing out after school whilst she stayed in and sewed.

Nanna married Grandad and he brought his own stories: learning to knit socks at school to send out to the soldiers during the First World War; some foods being only intermittently available during WW1 and his mother, hearing that a new delivery had arrived at the shop, sent him out in his school lunch break to get a couple of pounds of whatever it was. But, of course, all the old ladies had got there first and they always pushed this 8 year old boy to the back of the queue and he'd be scolded by his Mother when he went home empty handed; the strike he led at school - I bet he got thrashed for that! Nanna telling me that, when she agreed to go out with him, she found out that he'd got a girl waiting on every street corner!

Having children didn't come easily and after a series of miscarriages they had John, a little boy who lived only for an hour. So when my Mum was born she was baptisted immediately as she looking a bit doubtful too.

Jon's Gran was 96 when she died before Christmas. From her home in a tiny Wiltshire village she'd gone into service at the age of 14 to London - a nursery maid whose first charge was a little baby boy who went on to become a famous organist. Her stories: how, as a child, the gypsies had left a dog with her family to be cared for whilst they were away but she and her sister fell in love with the dog so, when the travellers returned, they hid it and said it had run away soon after they'd left; the telegraph pole she single-handedly 'liberated' for firewood during the war - well, it was just lying there...; the coalman who said he'd give her the fuel free if she'd carry it herself from the truck to her house on her back in the same way he did - he lost; her love of strong curries that was picked up from one of their tennants who was an army officer; oh, yes, and that incident at the butcher's during the war...

Researching your family history can give you some idea of the lives your ancestors led, but the stories are gone - Big Grandad's sister's death certificate may may give the bald facts, but the story will be lost to the future researcher who chances on it. I've been priviledged to know some wonderful people, all with unique stories that I wish I'd listened harder to and that I wish someone had recorded. There's more, there's so much more, and I feel like I want to sit and write everything down before I forget.

Anyway, here's to two women it's been an honour to know and the stories that go with them.

Bev

2009-04-26T19:25:00.006Z

Weddings

Well, 20 years after we graduated from university, another of us has got married.

We had a wonderful day with Jon and Susan celebrating their wedding and the pictures are on the web album over on the right of the screen.

The weather was kind as we picnicked on Box Hill for the reception and Peter's gramophone and 78s were a great hit - it had to be explained to the MP3 generation!

It was great to catch up with good friends that we see all too rarely and raise a glass to meeting up again a lot sooner than 2019!

2009-02-28T20:04:00.009Z

And this is what we got back to...snow!

There were rumours in Egypt that airports were closed back in Blighty and that we might not be able to get home - oh dear, we might have to stay in the sunshine a bit longer...

But we did get home and above is a snap from the train window on the way back from Gatwick on Thursday 5th Feb.

We were supposed to go to work on the Friday, but we couldn't get off the estate!

Here's what we woke up to. There are more photos of the snow at the end of the Egypt photo album =>

Actually, it was really nice to come home to something interesting, rather than the usual damp grey miserableness of the British winter.

2009-02-11T19:13:00.028Z

On us hols...

Well, actually, we're just back. From Egypt. Where we'd been for 2 weeks. In January. How decadent is that? We'd never been away for 2 weeks before so we weren't sure whether we'd still be speaking by the time we got back!

This was Jon's dream trip so he chose everything - I just tagged along for the ride - and it was brill. Our first week was on a cruise ship on the Nile from Luxor (ancient Thebes) down to Aswan and back and the 2nd week was in a hotel in Luxor. See the photos on our web album over on the right => but be warned, there are about 300! (I actually took 667 so count yourselves lucky that I didn't put them all up there!)

The ship was the Regency and it was great (although the rickety shower wasn't exactly 5* Delux). It has about 50 cabins so can only take just over 100 people which gave it a nice friendly feel. We were a bit nervous of the idea of being seated with other people on a large table at dinner - what happens if you're stuck with people you don't like for a week? But the other 3 couples we sat with for meals were lovely and really helped make the holiday (I hope they felt that we weren't too off-putting too!). All the trips below were included, as was the guide.

Day 1 - by coach to the west bank of the Nile to see the Colossi of Memnon - two enormous but badly damaged statues (damaged by earthquakes in 'antiquity'), Valley of the Kings and Queen Hatchepsut's Temple. The difference between the land watered by the Nile and the desert is so abrupt that it's stunning and you can see this best from

the 'plane or a hot-air balloon. It's amazing that almost all of Egypt's people live on that thin strip of green either side of the Nile. The Valley of the Kings is barely 20 mins drive from Luxor but it's so arid - which was why it was used of course - and you really do feel that you're in the desert. We saw the tombs of Thuthmosis III (a mammoth climb up and then down - don't attempt if you're scared of heights), Ramesses VII, Seti I and, of course, King Tut (which is a bit small and maybe disappointing, but you've just got to haven't you?). The tombs are stunning and it's almost impossible to believe that they were painted 3,500 years ago. Queen Hatchepsut's Temple is also amazing, especially the paintings that are virtually outside. That's something I couldn't get used to, being from such a damp country, that it NEVER rains in southern Egypt so nothing rots or gets washed away. The climate preserves everything: bodies, paint on buildings, wood, cloth... Back to the boat for lunch and an afternoon sailing to Edfu.

Day 2 - Edfu Temple of Horus in the morning, then an afternoon sailing to Kom Ombo and its temple dedicated to Sobek, the crocodile god - they even had mummified crocodiles! We'd been a bit concerned about the hassle you get on the streets from people trying to sell you tourist tat, boat, carriage and taxi rides or just asking for money. And 'yes', it is bad, very bad. Kom Ombo was the worst with the little kids almost stopping you from walking - one couple found it very difficult as the kids grabbed on to their legs and they had to be rescued by the tourist police. Most of the time a purposeful stride and a lack of eye contact coupled with 'no thank you' or 'larh shukran' worked, but the little buggers at Kom Ombo were very persistent. But often just walking on the side of the road furthest from the river made you less susceptible to hassle.

Day 3 - Free day in Aswan. We went for a walk to the market and went on the back streets, rather than the road along the Nile. This turned out to be a very good plan as we weren't hassled by anyone on the way into town. We found a normal shopping area, there were some tourist shops and their owners invited us in but were easily rebuffed, but most of the shops and stalls were selling real food, kitchen items, etc. Jon keeps telling me off for going on about the size of the cauliflowers and cabbages - not kidding, the heads of cauli were a foot across, they would have fed us for a week! Made me wish we were self-catering...

Day 4 - Coach trip to the 2 Aswan dams and Lake Nasser. Then a boat trip on Lake Nasser to the Temple of Philae which was saved from the lake and re-sited on an island. One of my obsessions is 18th and 19th century graffiti and I had a field-day photographing the carvings here! One paragraph was carved by someone working with the antiquarian Henry Salt in the early 19th century - how long must it have taken them to carve their names and details in immaculate copperplate script? Then a trip in a small boat on the Nile to see the Aga Khan's mausoleum, the Old Cataract Hotel (appears in 'Death on the Nile' I think, well Christie certainly stayed there), etc. We even had a kid paddle out into the very wide and busy Nile on a plank of wood to beg money from us! The older kids obviously had been in the business longer and they could afford a small canoe. Then a sailing back up to Esna.

Day 5 - We had an afternoon visit to Karnak, at one end of Luxor town, which is HUGE. We went back in the 2nd week and spent 3 hours there. I've got to say, that you have to be careful where the tourist police and guardians inside the temples and tombs are concerned. If they show you anything, lend you a piece of card as a fan in a hot tomb, point their torch into a dark corner, or get in the way of your camera when you're taking a picture, they expect baksheesh. From the middle of the first week I was starting every conversation with 'I have no Egyptian money left' and they'd smile and say 'No problem' and totter off to 'help' someone else.

Then to Luxor Temple, which is in the centre of Luxor Town and right next to our boat mooring. There was an avenue of sphinxes connecting Karnak with Luxor in ancient times and the government is spending millions re-siting (knocking down) hospitals, houses and mosques in order to re-create that avenue. So, one day, you may be able to walk along the avenue from one to the other. Our (Orthodox) guide took great pleasure in telling us that the government asked the Orthodox and Catholic churches if they would vacate their cathedrals to facilitate the re-creation of the avenue, and the Catholic response was, "Yes, of course...just as soon as you've built us a new one".

Day 6 - trip to Denderah Temple which was actually built by the Romans once they'd taken over Egypt. You can go on the roof!

Then most people went home and we transferred to the Nile Palace hotel - which was very nice. We even donned our cozzies and went for a dip in the pool! As well as returning to Karnak and Luxor Temple, we went to Luxor Museum and did a morning on the west bank at Deir el Medina (valley of the workers) and the Valley of the Queens. Deir el Medina is the town where the tomb builders lived and died, so you can see the remains of houses, cellars, streets as well as three tombs. I think that these tombs and the ones in the Valley of the Queens were at least as equal to those in the Valley of the Kings. The vibrancy of the paint in the ones at Deir el Medina was amazing.

Again, the hassle we got when walking into town was irritating, so, instead of turning left from our hotel door, we walked down a street opposite the hotel and then turned left when we could. We walked down local markets where no-one hassled us because they knew we weren't in the market for the bream and other Nile-caught fish spread out on banana leaves; nor the shaved goat's heads sitting serenely on a table next to their jointed bodies and offal; nor the entire windpipes, lungs and innards strung up outside the butchers' shops - watch where you're walking 'cos they dangle out into the pavement at eye height (the trays of honeycomb tripe reminded me of Wigan market); nor those huge cauliflowers again and piles of other brightly coloured plump vegetables.

So, would we go back? Well, despite the hassle, I think we'd like to see more of Egypt. I was surprised how clean everywhere was - European cities could learn a lot from Egypt's street cleaners. The temperature was perfect at about 26c - just like good summer days at home - and was not uncomfortable to walk round in even at midday. But it was so expensive! Everything was European prices (and London prices at that)

everywhere that a tourist might go, so we didn't drink much, even after we'd found a cheaper bar. But, lets face it, you can see Egyptian items in Bolton Museum (where I saw my first mummy) or the BM, but there's nothing to compare with seeing these artefacts in their original settings.

2008-12-01T22:13:00.015Z

And, by popular demand...

The last pictures of Mr H's 'tache before it was so cruely cut off in its prime.

As the finale to Movember they got some local school children in to vote on the best bit of facial hair in the office - erm, I'm not sure that 'beauty pagent' is quite the right phrase...
Unsurprisingly, it was Pete wot won it with this stunning display of facial foliage - how did you manage that in just a month? I reckon there must have been liberal applications of 'Miracle Grow'!

Anyway, they raised around £1,000 for charity - including a couple of hundred made in one day by selling home-made cakes to the other offices - with the company matching that, so £2,000 in total. They're all back to being clean-shaven now (much to the relief of their wives and children). Never has a month seemed so long!

Let's just hope they don't decide to go for Decembeards next year!

2008-11-27T20:30:00.007Z

For sale:

Nissan Almera 1.4 'Ambition' 3 Door.

1999 T reg.
60,000 miles, metallic silver, air conditioning, ABS, radio/CD player.
Good condition - full Nissan service history.
MOT'd to 30 July 2009, taxed to end January 2009.

£1000 ono

Ring Jon on 077360097460

2008-11-16T10:37:00.013Z

Are we hairy, yes we are!

As week 2 ends I'm a bit worried about the addition of a pipe.

Apparently, people keep telling Jon that the 'tash suits him so I do hope he's not getting too used to it!

Here are some of the other n'er-do-wells who are taking part - I'm no expert, but I think the one on the bottom left is a fake...

Thanks to those who have made a donation to the charity. Here's the link to Jon's MOVember page again. Their fund raising is doing very well, considering they've only been at it for a couple of weeks. If you do want to donate online, please click the badge below and then click 'donate' and choose 'donate to a team' and type 'magnum i.t' - this means that the money will show up as being raised by all the team.

2008-11-08T18:26:00.003Z

First week's progress

Well, as you can see, Jon is developing a fine bit of facial hair - and he looks about as happy with it as I am! Luckily, he looks more WWI officer than gay porn star, but there's time yet...

Here's the link to Jon's MOVember page again. Their fund raising is doing very well, considering they've only been at it for a week. If you do want to donate online, please click the badge below and then click 'donate' and choose 'donate to a team' and type 'magnum i.t' - this means that the money will show up as being raised by all the team.

2008-11-04T09:13:00.005Z

Mr Ferret grows whiskers...

Everyone in Jon's office is raising money for 'Movember' - a charity event held during November each year that raises funds for, and awareness of, men's health issues, in particular prostate cancer. For the men this involves growing moustaches... Yes, Jon with facial hair... Never will 30 days have gone past so slowly. Hopefully we'll be able to post update photos as the month progresses, but we doubt he'll manage any of these by the end of the month.

Anyway, here's a link to Jon's MOVember page. If you do want to donate online, please click the badge below and then click 'donate' and choose 'donate to a team' and type 'magnum i.t' - this means that the money will show up as being raised by all the team.

Tagged...

OK, so I've been tagged by Lizzie to reveal 6 random things about myself. The tag rules are: link to the person who tagged you; post the rules on your blog; write 6 random things about yourself; tag 6 people at the end of your post and link to them; let each person you have tagged know by leaving a comment on their blog; let the tagger know when your entry is posted.

Well, I can't tag 6 others 'cos I don't know anyone else (other than Lizzie) who blogs, but here goes for the random stuff...

1. I once had an erotic dream about Michael Portillo. You can't imagine how much that scared the s**t out of me when I woke up...

2. As a child I wanted to be Jewish and wear glasses. Well, I now wear glasses and, as an atheist, I make do with cooking chicken soup.

3. I've just found out how much I hate moustaches (see above). No, I really hate moustaches...

4. I love these people. I wish it was real life 'cos I'd move in.

5. I think that one of these is the best song ever written: The Lodger; Sister Josephine

6. I work on the 9th floor of a building on a hill which gives me views of two of Wiltshire's white horses, as well as most of Bath - does it get much better than that?

2008-09-22T19:00:00.013Z

Holidays...

As I mentioned last week, we booked a hol in Austria for the first week of term, which was the first week of September. We had a brilliant time and the weather was beautiful (whilst it was flooding again at home). Not our usual sort of thing 'cos it was a package booked with Crystal Lakes and Mountains just 9 days before departure and it was half-board - it was stunningly good value (i.e. cheap!).
But we loved it - being picked up from the airport and returned there at the end of the hol was a real luxury! We didn't have to work out bus/train timetables or worry about missing the 'plane. The food was very good in the hotel so we didn't eat anywhere else, although we had intended to eat a couple of meals out.

Mayrhofen was lovely, it's in the Ziller Valley in the Austria Tyrol and surrounded by the Alps. There were lots of waymarked walking routes and we found ourselves walking most days - our longest was an 8 miler into the next valley to visit the Stillupp Lake. On the way we stopped at a gasthof owned by someone who did falconry displays every afternoon and we just caught the end of one on our way back.

A couple of times a day the local transport company runs a steam train on the proper line between Mayrhofen and Jenbach so we took a trip on the normal train out to Jenbach and caught the steam train back. I think they also do steam train driving courses on a Friday! The paths were so well marked that many people just caught a train or bus to a local village and walked back - we did the reverse one day and walked as far as we could before catching the train back. We also took a few pictures of the 'hobby train', a smaller steam train that ran on an auxiliary line.

We went up the two cable cars that ran from the centre of Mayrhofen, the Penkenbahn and the Ahornbahn and did some walks at the top of those mountains - you could catch the cable car up and then walk down in about 2 hours, but we didn't try that. The weather was so hot on some days that up in the mountains was the coolest place to be. We did catch the bus to the Hintertux Glacier, where people were skiing and snowboarding in the middle of summer! We didn't take the cable car quite that high because it was very cloudy that day but our views of the glacier were still pretty stunning..

We've got lots of photos of our holiday over on our 'web album' on the right of the screen. Mayrhofen and the Austrian Alps have been added to our ever growing list of places to go back to, and are wondering if we could get there by bike...

2008-09-16T19:19:00.010Z

Free at last...

Well, it's been 3 months since I left the college and I've got to say, it was the best decision I've ever made. The first couple of weeks were a bit traumatic, I hadn't realised how such a big change would affect me - foolishly I thought I'd walk out of my old job and feel wonderful straight away, and was then disappointed when I didn't! But I'm feeling great now and managing very well on the reduced budget. I love not being a manager, not having to make decisions, not having to enforce decisions made by others that I didn't agree with, not having to manage and timetable staff, not having to work evenings, not having to play politics and I've not missed libraries or education one bit.

I'm enjoying my new job. I'm not responsible for anything and it's great! Being paid to watch the Olympics was fun but I've not managed to get my hands on the silver 'we' won yet - I did get two mugs brought back for me from Bejing though!

I've especially enjoyed booking a holiday to Austria for the first week of what would have been the start of term, as well as booking a fortnight in Egypt for the middle of next January (2 weeks for what it would have cost us to go for 1 week during college holidays).

This blog is interspersed with just a few photos of very well-named vehicles we've noticed on our travels. The car is in the Haynes Motor Museum in Sparkford and the scooter was spotted in Spain a couple of years ago. Obviously motor companies know class when they see it...

2008-06-19T19:12:00.004Z

Thank you and goodbye...

Well, after 11 years working for the college, I've taken voluntary redundancy. Yesterday was my last day 'cos I've got leave to take but I officially finish on 30th June. I only actually found out at 5pm last Tuesday, so it's all been a bit of a rush - which thankfully meant that no-one had time to plan a big leaving do! The college had merged with another college at the start of the year and as this was my second merger and second round of redundancies, so I decided that I'd rather not stick around this time.

I have just over a week off before I start a new job as an office administrator for a considerably smaller salary but, hopefully with less stress and more enjoyment. Also the added bonus of no staff to manage, no students, no having to take holidays in college vacations. We should also be able to car-share which should cut costs a bit too. The redundancy money will be stashed away so that I can choose to walk away from any future job when it starts to make me a quarter as miserable as I have been for the last 4 years!

Despite the short time between me finding out I was leaving and actually going, my colleagues still found time to get a huge card full of signatures and do a whipround. so I came away with vouchers for Watlings in Lacock and 5 bottles of beer with £5 notes wrapped round the necks! I wish all beer came like that!

It was Jon's 40th birthday at the weekend which he celebrated by going to Brussels with Oscar, Davvy and Bones - involving cartoon museums and lots of beer - leaving me free to watch the Le Mans 24 hours on Eurosport all weekend. Lovely weekends were had by all, on both sides of the Channel!

2008-02-04T16:00:00.000Z

Murderer!

Had a couple of disasters with the Roomba when first it fell downstairs and then I cut a wire whilst cleaning it out. I felt like a murderer - it's a common phenomenon amongst Roomba owners to see them as children or pets and as we have neither children nor pets the Roomba might be fulfilling an emotional gap... At least we haven't got 'clothes' for it yet! Although, when I mentioned at work that you could dress it up, the one question that everyone asked was "Can you get a French maid's outfit for it?". I do wonder how much vacuum cleaner abuse goes on behind closed doors... I do like "mooba the Cow" though...

The fall didn't seem to affect its performance but the wire was the one that made the brushes turn, so that was a bit of a problem. Anyway, it turned out the the importer is just in the next town, so I dropped it off Monday lunchtime and it was fixed by Tuesday afternoon! All under John Lewis's warranty so it didn't cost us a penny.

This weekend was spent in Exeter visiting Mr Oscar, and Keith came down to watch Hull City play Plymouth Town (he didn't invite Jon to the match so Hull City won). Mr O suggested a trip to Sidmouth for Sunday lunch - this would be on the day when gales were forecast in the southwest, just after the snows had moved into Exmoor... It was incredibly windy - even my granny wouldn't have described it as 'fresh' - it was bloody rough! The sea was amazing, I don't think I've ever seen it so rough, and I'd never experienced the sea foaming up like that - it looked like someone had let a fire extinguisher off in the street! Needless to say there was some pillock surfing and being filmed by his mate - it was probably on MySpace by teatime. Lovely lunch though and a great weekend.

2007-11-12T15:00:00.000Z

Our new toy. When the Dyson gave up the ghost after 10 years of sterling service and abuse we were hunting around for a new cleaner. So, meet the Roomba, our robotic carpet sweeper. It's brilliant, we just set it off in a different room each morning and by the time we get home it's spotless! We just use the hand-held car-vac for the corners and the stairs, but the Roomba does the rest whilst we're out. It even has a sensor to stop it falling down stairs! We love it.

2007-09-17T13:09:00.000Z

The next trip was a day in London for Jon to potter round a museum whilst I went to Anthony Gormley's Blind Light exhibition at the Hayward Gallery. It was fantastic. Being in the box was one of the most amazing experiences - basically it was a perspex box with a humidifyer belching out damp 'smoke' which you walked into. People loomed out of the mist and you really did not know that someone was standing a couple of feet away. When we were standing outside, people inside came to the perspex walls to peer out before being absorbed back into the smoke. Once inside it was the most isolating and disorienting feeling because it was so bright white that you couldn't actually see anything outside yourself - what you were seeing were the 'floaters' that move about on your eyeballs - until another person hove into view. I'm so glad I went. Space station was brilliant as well. He's also got these large figures ('Event Horizon') placed on buildings near the Hayward, all looking toward the gallery. this was really disconcerting too as, whenever you looked out of the building, one of these figures was 'looking' at you from a roof or balcony.

In the evening we had dinner at Levantine with Keith before catching the last train home.

2007-09-17T12:44:00.000Z

So, the day after the mudfest, we went down to Devon. George and Caroline were lending us their Morgan as a wedding pressie, so we'd booked a gorgous hotel, Northcote Manor in Umberleigh, to go with it. We stayed with George and Caroline on Monday and met their new arrival, Edward - Jon's god-son - who is gorgeous (just as his sisters are).

After being taught how to get the roof up and down, etc we were ready for the off. As you can see from the photo it's a beautiful car and looked great at the hotel and National Trust houses we took it to. There are lots more pictures on the link to our photo album on the right of the screen. The weather was awful again so we didn't manage to take the roof down until we were taking it back to its owners. The hotel was absolutely fantastic and the food was wonderful. We'll be saving up to try to go back next year.

Stopped off at the Haynes Motor Museum in Sparkford on the way back at the end of the week. It was great and we spent hours there. Could hardly drag Jon away.

2007-09-17T10:53:00.000Z

'Grief, I can't believe it was May when I last blogged. Ooops, I'll try to do better from now on. My excuse is that I haven't been having my Mondays off whilst it's been the College hols and, as Blogger is blocked at work, I've not even been able to catch up in my lunch hours. Anyway, 'normal' service is now resumed.

So, to pick up where we left off... We'd had a 40th birthday, a 100th birthday, then it was Jon's Dad's 60th birthday. It mostly kept off rain for the party on the Saturday (23rd June) but the following weekend when we all (8) went down to a cottage in Devon the weather was awful - that set the tone for the summer really. A nice time was had by all though.

We also managed to fit in a brewery tour of Wadworths in Devizes, home of 6X. This year does seem to be developing a beer theme to it. We had a great evening and saw the cooper (from Yorkshire, but I'm sure it's not his fault), the shire horses and got several free pints - one of which Jon drew himself - and bottles to take home.

Jon had a very wet trip to Le Mans to drink champagne with his Dad at the 24 hour race.

One of my aims for the year was to go to a music festival, but decided that Glastonbury was a bit too big. So we hit on the Trowbridge Village Pump Festival (we know how to live don't we...) partly because it's only a mile from Jon's parents', so if we got flooded out we could walk across the field to a cup of tea and a hot shower! I felt quite smug when a colleague was flooded out at Glastonbury, 'cos the Village Pump was at the end of July and I expected the weather to be much better by then. How wrong I was... It turned out to be the weekend that Tewkesbury and most of Gloucestershire flooded! We got there on Thursday afternoon and drove down a slope in a field to find a place to pitch the tent and couldn't get the car back up! A slight smattering of rain had made the grass a bit damp, so we left it there, pitched the tent and settled down to watch lots of other cars do the same, with varying amounts of success. Anyway, that night was great, with Martin Carthy and Dave Swarbrick (Steeleye Span and Fairport Convention respectively) kicking off the main stage with some traditional folkie stuff. They ware followed by Seth Lakeman who certainly got everyone leaping about. Lat up were The Levellers at 11.45pm who were brilliant. Jon had heard them at Le Mans, so The Levellers, rain and mud are now synonymous for him! As they now are of a 'certain age' the lead singer said a few times that they weren't used to playing gigs mid-week anymore or coming on stage so late - it was way past his bedtime! I think there was an ad camapign for Crowded House several years ago which said 'You know more Crowded House songs than you realise' and The Levellers are a bit like that. Anyway, they were brill and we had a great evening.

We'd just got into our sleeping bags, sometime after 1.30am, when the rain started and it was torrential, but only a few drips came through the tent so we were very lucky. We'd taken all our wet weather walking gear (over-trousers, boots, etc) so we donned that the next day and strode forth. It got incredibly muddy and flooded very quickly but everyone seemed to have a good time - especially the kids running around in bare feet! We stuck it out until Sunday morning 'cos we wanted to see the Hot House Flowers on Saturday night. They took a while to warm up and were a bit disappointing.

The loos were getting very bad by Sunday and, as we were heading down to Devon on Monday we thought we'd go home and get a good night's sleep (as well as a bath!). We only needed a quick push to get us out of the campsite, but lots of other people needed tractors to drag them out of the mud and up the hills. I had a great time over all - lots of great beer, cider and food - but Jon likes his home comforts so he was a bit ambivalent. OK, he hated it, but coped very well!

Anyway, tips for camping 1. get a cool-bag and freeze everything that you put in it - milk, cartons of juice, etc along with those freezer block things - before you go. This kept the stuff fridge-cold from Thursday afternoon until Sunday morning.

2007-05-31T09:21:00.000Z

More beer and birthdays

Thanks to everyone who's sent us wedding cards. We've only just taken them down and have enjoyed looking through them and reading your messages.

Info for those what 'ave asked... Straffe Hendrick was sold to Riva and is now brewed by Liefmans who took over Riva a couple of years ago.

This month's caption competition is of Mr H on one of my Dad's sit-on mowers - no prize offered, just the smuggness of winning. Obviously he was emulating his hero...

Barely had we got back from Bruges but we were off up to Wigan for my Nanna's 100th birthday. Believe it or not, until about 3 months ago she was looking after herself in her own home - cooking meals, etc (albeit with carers popping in to help her out of bed in the morning and put her back in last thing at night). But problems with her legs meant she was having difficulty standing up at the cooker and, after a couple of falls, she finally decided to go into residential care. She's in the same home as my other Gran, just 5 minutes walk from my parents' house, with her own single en-suite room over-looking Worthington Lakes and is fully enjoying the three square meals a day!

The Home made a great fuss of her, putting pictures of her and banners around the place and the owner even popped in with a bouquet. She had loads of visitors and thoroughly enjoyed being the centre of attention. And in the picture 'yes' it is her own hair and 'no' it hasn't gone completely grey yet!

When they were looking a bit tired we took our leave and walked over to the Crown in Bradley. The Lotus owners club meet there the first Saturday each month so we sat on the 'sun terrace' (decking) overlooking some fabbie cars in the car park. The bar had some fantastic cask ales on draught but sadly they don't list them on the website as they change so quickly - the majority of them we'd never heard of. Their selection of foreign beers was pretty impressive too. We decided to stay for dinner (the steak and kidney pudding was to die for) and and the wine waiter was very knowledgeable and enthusiastic about their beers. Mum and Dad came up for a couple of drinks and to collect us on their way back from a wedding at about 8.30. All in all a very nice day.

Oh, and if anyone wants to buy my Dad's 'classic' Z1300 Kawasaki - see attached photo - just leave us your contact details as a comment

2007-05-21T14:12:00.000Z

NOTE: if you're new to the blog and are looking for the diary of our India trip please scroll down to the November Archive on the right.

Bruges

So, after all the rellies had decamped on my birthday we went for a quiet Chinese and several more beers (which I realised at 2am may have been a tactical error on my part...) with Davvie, Bones and Keith. After they prevented me from singing several verses of the Hedgehog Song - Terry Pratchett shares my birthday (and Nanny Ogg is a serious role model) - we ended up back at the Angel Hotel 12 hours after our first visit.

On Sunday lunchtime we met up with almost everyone from the day before, but in Bath this time, for lunch at the Salamander. Howard was able to join us too - his Dad's 70th birthday was also on the 28th so, understandably, he had other priorities yesterday. Lots of time was spent in the Old Green Tree later in the afternoon - beer seems to have become rather a theme of this birthday - quelle surprise...

On Monday we went to Bruges on the Eurostar via Brussels. Jon had sneakily booked my leave with my boss without me knowing - so several people at work knew I was going away over a month before I did! There was so much secret-keeping about this whole weekend I'm amazed that no-one ever got confused and let one of the several cats out of the various bags - shows how cunning we are, doesn't it? We stayed at the Hotel Navarra, which was wonderful and just a stone's throw from the Markt. We'd definitely stay there again.

The first evening we sauntered around and ended up at 't Brugs Beertje - OK, yes, as it's one of the most hallowed pubs in Bruges, we were actually looking for it. We were lucky to get a table as it was beginning to fill up and I bet it's packed during high season. Great place with brilliant beer, it was with reluctance that we left after a couple of drinks to stagger a few yards down the road to the Bistro Tolkien to get some food.

The following day we did the tour of the Half Moon Brewery - the last working brewery in Bruges centre. They used to brew Straffe Hendrik but have now sold it and brew Brugse Zot blond (6%) and dark (7.5%). The tour was worth every penny and we got free beer at the end too - I love the Belgians...

We then did a boat tour of the canal, which was great for getting a different view of the city, before tottering round the Memling exhibition. The hotel has a lovely little garden at the back so went back there and ordered a couple of Brugse Zots and settled down to read: see Mr H's composition 'Still Life with Cheese' - that's what an afternoon in the art galleries does for you... or was it the morning in the brewery?

Jon had booked a restaurant when he booked the trip - in early March - Den Dyver (also spelled Dijver) which co-ordinates its food with beer. It was only when we walked in that we realised it we'd seen it on the 'Hairy Bikers Ride Again' a couple of weeks before. We went for the 4 course set menu with its beers to accompany each dish. It was fantastic, the food was wonderful and we had a great evening. Personally, I could have done without facing a photo of the maitre d' sitting naked on one of the restaurant chairs, but it didn't put me off my dinner (but then very little does!). I just hope they use a good disinfectant...

Then back home the following day. The only train that was late during the whole trip was the one bringing us back to Chippenham...

When I got back to work the next day, my colleagues had decorated my desk (and they got my car too before I went home). They'd also bought us a box of beer as a wedding present - can't imagine where they'd got the idea that we like beer...

More photos are on the album here.

Oh, as everyone seems to be asking... 'No', I won't be changing my name, but we're quite happy to get post addressed to 'Mr & Mrs Hazell' (or 'Mr & Mrs Mason' if you'd prefer!).

The photos the Gazette and Herald took are now available to buy - click here, then click 'search' and look through the 'hits' to find the one of us as a couple and the one of the boys toasting Jon. Then just click to order. A 7x5 print costs £8.00.

2007-05-07T20:59:00.000Z

A funny thing happened on the way to the Beer Festival... Bev's 40th birthday, Saturday 28th April.

Happy birthday to me. Happy birthday to me. Happy birthday dear me-he. Happy birthday to me!

I decided to celebrate at the 16th Chippenham Beer Festival since they were kind enough to hold it on my birthday – very thoughtful of them , I think you'll agree. It also meant that I didn't have to organise a party and it saved wear and tear on the new carpet.

Attendees were carefully selected from those of our acquaintance who appreciate murky beer and rough cider and can talk bollocks about them even before the first pint of Old Tom (8.5%) has taken effect. And when that didn't narrow the guest list down much we just picked those who could make it on the day. (To any friends who feel that they meet the initial criteria but weren't invited, our apologies. Get in touch and we'll put you on next year's guest list). So, this year's motley assortment were: Bev and Jon, Bev's Dad, Jon's Dad and his mate Dave, Jon's brother and sister, Messrs Davvie, Bones and Keith. With Bev and Jon's Mums and Helen (with Archie) doing the driving and having a potter round town for the afternoon.

Anyway, a funny thing happened on the way to the Beer Festival... We got married...

Yes, your eyes didn't deceive you. After almost 20 years of unwedded bliss we're now legal. We decided about 3 weeks before my birthday and didn't tell anyone, well except the Registar of course (oh, and George and Caroline, but more of that later). We arranged a strategy where Jon would tell all the above (and Roz) that they had to be at the Angel Hotel at 11.30am for Jon to give me a birthday surprise. They thought that he was going to tell me that we were going away to Bruges – which actually was a surprise but he had to tell me a couple of days before because he was fed up with me making appointments for Monday 30th and him having to keep ringing people 5 mins later and cancelling them! So, everyone turns up, Jon proposes a toast and tells them that I already know what my present is, and I say “You thought you all knew what the surprise was, but the real surprise is just round the corner, please follow us”.

So, we led them into Timber Street and round behind the Museum and then heard the chorus of screams as the Mothers spotted the 'Registry Office' sign. There was general hysteria from the rellies and much giggling from Jon and me – it really was worth keeping it secret just to see everyone's faces as they realised what was happening. So that explains why Jon and I are more formally dressed and everyone else looks like they're going to a beer festival. They were all shown upstairs into the ceremony room (which is lovely – Georgian with chandeliers and beautiful flower arrangements) and had just about calmed down by the time we were shown in.

We kept the ceremony very simple and didn't exchange rings, but it still felt like a proper official ceremony – more than we'd expected it to. Jon's sister Claire and our friend from university, Keith, were the witnesses. As with most weddings, the photos took longer than the ceremony, but by 12.30 we were downing our first halves at the Beer Festival. Apparently, Helen had to take the Mums for a cup of tea and feed them to calm them down 'cos they were so jittery and didn't know if they were coming or going!

Then members of our group spotted the photographer from the Gazette and Herald... Knowing that this would be just the sort of story he would like he was waylaid and we ended up having a couple of photos taken - this and this. When the piece about the Beer Festival appeared in the paper on Thursday the headline read "Lovebirds live merrily ever after. Couple share a pint just after tying the knot on the day of town's popular beer and cider bonanza"!

I got £5.00 of free tokens for saying we'd just got married and when Jon went up to the bar with his “I do” badge on from George he was given his tokens back and was given a free drink! Our friends George and Caroline couldn't make it to Chippenham as their third child had just put in an appearance, which is why they were the only people to know in advance what we were planning. So George had t-shirts made up saying “Just Married” with the CAMRA logo on, so we changed into those quite soon and Jon got more free beer when he went to to the bar!

Anyway, we had a lovely afternoon on the grass in the park, drinking beer and talking rubbish in the sunshine. At 3.30pm they called last orders and we wandered back to the house to have tea and cake with Helen, Archie and the Mums. But it was our turn to be surprised – whilst we'd been at the Beer Fest they'd managed to find a wedding cake in Chippenham, complete with plastic couple and everything! Lots of champagne was added to the beer, but luckily there was lots of cake to soak it up! All in all it was a very good 40th birthday.

So, why did we do it? Well, as you all know, there's no such thing as 'common law marriage' and unmarried couples have no rights to inherit, etc. Although we'd got Wills and Enduring Powers of Attorneys set up there were still one or two areas that we couldn't legally sort out without being married - pensions and Inheritance Tax amongst them - so we gave in!

2007-04-06T16:24:00.000Z

Did your partner fail to buy you that Cadbury's Dairy Milk Easter egg?

Sainsburys suggests a way of ensuring he remembers next year...

Oh, and the charity total so far is £2,046.61

2007-03-03T10:18:00.000Z

NOTE: if you're new to the blog and are looking for the diary of our India trip please scroll down to the November Archive on the right.

New fundraising total is £2,036.61.

Life seems rather boring now that there's no India trip to plan for. I've decided not to do the MA this year as I thought I'd have a property development project to do. The maths didn't stack up on that though so I decided not to do it, but to try to save up a deposit for a future property project instead (oh, and pay off the bill for the India trip!).

It does seem rather strange not having to do OU course work all the time, but on the bright side, I've read 15 books already this year! My record so far has been 3 novels in 7 days - me, bored? What makes you think that?

2007-01-28T13:11:00.000Z

Our fundraising total now stands at £2,001.61! So thank you to everyone who has helped us reach our target figure.

You're probably fed up with me saying that I never thought we'd get more than £500 - but it's true - and we're really incredibly touched and grateful to everyone who has donated. What stars you all are!

Bev

2007-01-25T20:45:00.000Z

NOTE: if you're new to the blog and are looking for the diary of our India trip please scroll down to the November Archive on the right.

By popular demand, here's a picture of my favourite Christmas decoration and, yes, it really is a pink transvestite poodle. I'd keep her out all year if I didn't have to dust her, but at least having her put away each year means that I have a reason to look forward to Christmas - 'cos I'll see her again!

Jon's had his bike MOT'd today and loved riding it after 2 months of it being in the garage. We're looking into altering the ride-height on my bike so that I feel as secure on it as I did on the Enfield.

We've finally had all the India photos printed and are in the process of putting an album together - so prepare to be bored to death if you come round! In fact we'll probably bring it with us when we visit... you have been warned!

Bev

2006-12-28T21:42:00.000Z

Current fundraising total is £1,991.61. The Just Giving website has now closed so I'll be putting updates on the total on here only.

Oh, and I got a first in my Open University degree. Yes, that is insufferable smuggness that you can feel radiating through your VDU. Nice that all the hard work paid off - MA in History of Art here I come!

Happy New Year!